Joke #666

What's a difference between a blond and a mosquito? once you smack a mosquito it stops sucking
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has 59.79 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, blonde

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An old blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake... He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things: The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat. The bouncer is a blonde girl with a 'Billy-Club'. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler. Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy... Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?" The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, "No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times..."
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has 79.99 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, blonde, cowboy, women
Q: What is a blondes' reaction to hearing "drinks are on the house". A: Where's the stairs.
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has 64.28 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, blonde
Q: What's a blonde's favorite drink A: A cocktail.
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, blonde, dirty
Three women were sitting in a bar, (a brunette, red head, and a blonde) they were all pregnant. The brunette says, "I know what I'm going to have." The other to asked how. She replied, "well I was on top when I conceived so I will have a boy". The red head said, "If that is true then I will have a girl because I was on the bottom when I conceived. The blonde starts crying and orders another shot and starts screaming, "PUPPIES, PUPPIES!".
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has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, blonde, ginger, women
A blonde, a priest, a doctor, a nurse, a brunette, a redhead, a lawyer, a rabbi, a musician, a farmer, a lawyer, an accountant, a Mexican, an Indian, a Chinaman, an Irishman, an Englishman an American, A Russian, an Iraqi, Hilary Clinton, Bill Clinton, Sarah Palin, George W Bush, Osama Bin laden and Barack Obama walked into a bar. The barman said, "Hang on a minute, is this some sort of joke?"
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has 29.36 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, blonde, lawyer, nurse, priest
Three women were sitting in a bar, (burnette, redhead, and a blonde) they were all pregnant. The burnette says, "I know what I'm going to have." The other to asked how. She replied, "Well I was on top when I concieved so I will have a baby boy". The red head said, "If your logic is correct then I will have a baby girl because I was on the bottom when I concieved. The blonde starts crying and orders another shot and starts screaming, "PUPPIES, PUPPIES!".
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has 28.61 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, baby, bar, blonde, ginger
Roses are blue My thumb's got a sliver I drank far too much and I'm killing my liver.
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has 51.13 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, death, drunk, poems
Did you hear about the new blonde paint? It’s not very bright, but it’s cheap, and spreads easy.
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has 28.61 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: blonde
He doesn’t drink anything stronger than pop. Mind you Pop will drink anything.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
A blonde says to her doctor, "Each time I try to sip my coffee, my eye hurts." The doctor says, "Maybe you should take the stirrer out of the cup."
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has 74.15 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: blonde