Joke #7186

A Jehovah's Witnesses knocked on my door yesterday, so I answered it and asked if he wanted to come in he said, "Yeah, okay." I said I'm just making a cup of tea do you want one? He said, "Yeah, sure." I said I've just made some toast do you want a slice? He said, "Yeah, why not." I then he sat down and I asked him, "So what now?" He said, "I don't know I've never got this far before!"
Vote: has 74.97 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, religious

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

John was sitting outside his local pub one day, enjoying a quiet pint and generally feeling good about himself, when a nun suddenly appears at his table and starts decrying the evils of drink. "You should be ashamed of yourself young man! Drinking is a Sin! Alcohol is the blood of the devil!" Now John gets pretty annoyed about this, and goes on the offensive. "How do you know this, Sister?" "My Mother Superior told me so." "But have you ever had a drink yourself? How can you be sure that what you are saying is right?" "Don't be ridiculous--of course I have never taken alcohol myself" "Then let me buy you a drink - if you still believe afterwards that it is evil I will give up drink for life" "How could I, a Nun, sit outside this public house drinking?!" "I'll get the barman to put it in a teacup for you, then no one will ever know." The Nun reluctantly agrees, so John goes inside to the bar. "Another pint for me, and a triple vodka on the rocks", then he lowers his voice and says to the barman "and could you put the vodka in a teacup?" "Oh no! It's not that Nun again is it?"
Vote: has 71.97 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bar, life, religious
Guy gets pulled over in his car by a pair of dudes in balaclavas, pointing guns in his face. Terrorist (menacing voice): "Are you a Catholic or a Protestant?" Driver, panicking, doesn't know which answer will save his life, has a bright idea. Driver: "Neither, actually. In fact I'm Jewish." Terrorist shouts to other terrorist: "Fucking hell Abdul, we've got one at last!"
Vote: has 71.40 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, jewish, life, religious, terrorist
What is Jehovah's wiseness favorite band? The Doors.
Vote: has 66.96 % from 35 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: god, life, music, religious
Religion is a lot more like politics. The only difference is that with religion you get to confess your own sins.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, political, religious
The November 5th Gunpowder Plot has been described as the 9/11 of its day. Staged by the government to discredit an entire religion.
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, political, religious, time
Man: You've brought religion into my life. Woman: Really? How? Man: Until I met you, I didn't believe in Hell.
Vote: has 52.42 % from 183 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, marriage, religious
Cletus Cletus goes to work and sees that one of his co-workers has a thermos. He asks him what it does and the fellow co-worker responds, "It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold." Cletus was amazed and when he got home immediately went out and bought one. The next day he goes to work and is proud that he has this wonderful object. The same co-worker realizes he has a thermos and says, "What do you have in it?" He says, "Soup and ice cream!"
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, life, work
Patient to doctor: "On the top of your prescription these words are printed: We treat; God Cures. If so, would I give the fee to you or shall I send it to God?" Doctor: "Pay me. I will send it."
Vote: has 78.59 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, god, life
Q: Why do Republicans avoid living on the West Coast? A: They're scared to live that close to the edge of the Earth.
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: geography, life, republican
An Irish priest and a Rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on a train. After a while, the priest opened a conversation by saying "I know that, in your religion, you’re not supposed to eat pork... Have you actually ever tasted it?" The Rabbi said, "I must tell the truth. Yes, I have, on the odd occasion." Then the Rabbi had his turn of interrogation. He asked, "Your religion, too... I know you’re supposed to be celibate. But..." The priest replied, "Yes, I know what you’re going to ask. I have succumbed once or twice." There was silence for a while. Then the Rabbi peeped around the newspaper he was reading and said, "Better than pork, isn’t it?"
Vote: has 67.10 % from 82 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: priest, religious, sex, travel