Joke #9843

What has more brains than a dead baby? The wall behind it.
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has 65.69 % from 567 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, morbid

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After my wife died, I couldn't even look at another woman for 10 years. But now that I'm out of jail, I can honestly say it was worth it!
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has 83.86 % from 144 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, morbid, prison, women
Today was a terrible day. My ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.
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Dr. Dave had sex with one of his patients and felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it he just couldn't. The guilt was overwhelming. But every once in a while he would hear in internal, reassuring voice in his head that said: "Dave don't worry about it. You aren't the first medical practitioner to have sex with one of his patients and you won't be the last. Just let It go Dave." But invariably another voice in his head would bring him back to reality whispering: "Dave... Daaaave... you're a veterinarian you sick bastard!"
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has 80.99 % from 604 votes. More jokes about: black humor, disgusting, doctor, morbid, sex
This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic. If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire. If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that the port wing has fallen off. If you look down towards the Atlantic ocean, you will see a little yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you. That's me your captain, the co-pilot, and one of the air stewardesses. This is a recorded message. Have a good flight!
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has 79.05 % from 219 votes. More jokes about: airplane, black humor, death, morbid, travel
Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
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has 73.60 % from 108 votes. More jokes about: black humor, life, men, morbid, time
Q: What does your Mama and a slinky have in common? A: They aren't much to look at but you can't help cracking a smile when you see it tumbling down the stairs.
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has 71.41 % from 228 votes. More jokes about: black humor, morbid, Yo mama
What's the difference between a dead baby and a Styrofoam cup? A dead baby doesn't harm the atmosphere when you burn it.
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has 67.95 % from 417 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, morbid
Q: What is the difference between baby and knitting? A: Knitting is weaved by two needles and one ball, but the baby has been made with one needle and two balls!
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has 67.15 % from 184 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor, morbid
Q: What was Hitler's favorite drink? A: Concentrated jews.
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has 65.47 % from 426 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, Hitler, jewish, morbid
Q: How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? A: I don't know, there are twenty in my basement, and my basement light still isn't fixed.
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has 64.97 % from 480 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, light bulb, morbid