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If it weren’t for marriage, women would have to spend most of their adult lives arguing with complete strangers.
Vote: has 87.16 % from 273 votes. Send joke:

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Married men live longer than single men, but married men are more willing to die.
Vote: has 87.15 % from 237 votes. Send joke:

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I can remember where I got married. I can remember when I got married. I just can’t remember why.
Vote: has 87.13 % from 154 votes. Send joke:

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A teacher said to her class, "Right, i'm going to hold something under the desk and i want you to guess it. This one is round and red." Little Johnny's hand shot up, but he was ignored. "It's a plum miss," said a girl. "no it's an apple, but i like your thinking. The next one is oval shaped and green." The teacher ignored Little Johnny again and a boy said, "It's a kiwi miss." No, it's a guana, but i like your thinking." Little Johnny said, " I got one miss, its stiff, about an inch long and with a red nib." "Johny, thats disgusting!" shouted the teacher. " no it's a match, but i like your thinking." Said Little Johnny.
Vote: has 87.13 % from 1650 votes. Send joke:

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Personally, I think one of the greatest things about marriage is that, as both husband and father, I can say anything I want to around the house. Of course, no one pays the least bit of attention.
Vote: has 87.12 % from 135 votes. Send joke:

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Jack and his wife lived in Arizona where the summers are very hot. He woke up one day when they were having a heat wave. As he stepped out of the shower he complained to his wife saying, “it’s just too hot to wear any clothes on a day like this. What would the neighbors think if I mowed the lawn with no clothes.” “That I married you only for your money.”
Vote: has 87.11 % from 200 votes. Send joke:

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Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, "Dad, why are you doing that?" His father replied, "Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Johnny, looking worried, said, "Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom."
Vote: has 87.09 % from 861 votes. Send joke:

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My wife and I have agreed never to go to bed angry with one another. So far we’ve been up for three weeks.
Vote: has 87.09 % from 172 votes. Send joke:

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Women look at a wedding as the beginning of romance, while men look at a wedding as the ending of romance.
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Q: What's the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers? A: Mechanical engineers build weapons; civil engineers build targets.
Vote: has 87.08 % from 125 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: military