The best dad jokes

My previous girlfriend had this weird sleeping disorder - in the middle of every night she would wake up and suck my dick. No wonder her dad did not want her to move out.
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has 39.11 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dad, sex
A scoutmaster asked one of his troop what good deed he had done for the day. "Well, Skip," said the scout, "Dad had only one bottle of beer left, so I let my baby brother have it."
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has 38.22 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: baby, beer, dad, kids
An internet maniac boy asks his father: Daddy, why do we have five fingers if the mouse has only two buttons?
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: computer, dad, IT
A 5 year old black boy walks up to a 5 year old white boy and says, "My daddy's goy a car. When he honks the horn it goes 'honkey honkey'". Little white boy says, "shit, my daddys got a chain saw when he starts it up it goes 'run nigga nigga run'".
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has 37.51 % from 128 votes. More jokes about: age, car, dad, kids, racist
Yo mama is so stupid, she did her dad last night.
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has 36.78 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: dad, insulting, sex, stupid, Yo mama
Why does the chicken is sad? Because his dad is a cock. Why does the chicken is even more sad? Because he faces the same future.
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has 36.08 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: animal, dad
Jesus is the son of God. God is the son of Chuck Norris.
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has 35.87 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dad, family, golf
Q: What do you call a fight between you and your dad? A: Dady issues!
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has 35.78 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, dad
Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day. "My name is Billy. What's yours?" asked the first boy. "Tommy," replied the second. "My Daddy's an accountant. What does your Daddy do for a living?" asked Billy. Tommy replied, "My Daddy's a lawyer." "Honest?" asked Billy. "No, just the regular kind", replied Tommy.
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has 34.09 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: age, dad, kids, lawyer
Little Susan was helping her mother to set the table, cause her father invited over his company managers. When everybody sat on the table, her mother noticed that a flatware set was missing. "Susan, why didn’t you put flatware on Mr. Marc’s seat?" "I thought that I didn’t have to, since dad told us that Mr. Marc, eats like a pig…"
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has 29.23 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: animal, dad, kids
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