A scoutmaster asked one of his troop what good deed he had done for the day.
"Well, Skip," said the scout, "Dad had only one bottle of beer left, so I let my baby brother have it."
An internet maniac boy asks his father:
Daddy, why do we have five fingers if the mouse has only two buttons?
How do you know when your sister is on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes like blood.
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Why does the chicken is sad?
Because his dad is a cock.
Why does the chicken is even more sad?
Because he faces the same future.
Jesus is the son of God.
God is the son of Chuck Norris.
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What did the dad say when his son said, "Dad I'm tired of walking in circles?"
"Shut up kid or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."
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One morning I called my girlfriend and his father picked "Hello who are you?"
I heard that heavy voice and quickly replied a while "hey Eric where are you the choir is about to begin?"
"What choir?" he asked.
"Come on Eric stop kidding around and get your ass over here" the father then replied
"Sorry am not Eric and I don't know what you are talking about I am dr Stephen" he said.
I then said "oh sorry I must have misdialled"
I then hang up and decided I am never gonna call that girl again...
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Q: What's a blonde's favourite wine?
A: "Daaaddy, I want to go to Miaaami!"
Dad, would you like to save some money?
I certainly would, son.
Any suggestions?
Sure.
Why not buy me a bike, then I won't wear my shoes out so fast.
A family walks into a talent agency.
It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog.
The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act.
You should represent us."
The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute."
The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us."
The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look."
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