The best dog jokes

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't because it won't come.
Vote: has 29.98 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dog, food
In what type of weather is the vet the busiest? When its raining cats and dogs.
Vote: has 29.93 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, cat, dog, weather
Q: What do you call a chilly dog sitting on bunny? A: A Cold dog on a bun.
Vote: has 29.01 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dog
In a park people come across a man playing chess against a dog. They were astonished and said: "What a clever dog!" But the man protested and replied: "No, no, he isn't that clever. I'm leading by three games to one!"
Vote: has 28.61 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dog, game, sport
Two drunks had just gotten thrown out of the bar and are walking down the street when they come across this dog, sitting on the curb, licking his balls. They stand there watching and after a while one of them says, " I sure wish I could do that!" The other one looks at him and says, "Well, I think I'd pet him first".
Vote: has 26.98 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, dog, drunk
What is the definition of revenge? A baby with a dog in its mouth.
Vote: has 18.14 % from 61 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, baby, disgusting, dog
Bears do not eat bears. Tigers do not eat tigers. Dogs do not eat dogs. Cats stopped eating kebabs.
Vote: has 15.22 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, cat, dog, food
A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look."
Vote: has 14.85 % from 260 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, disgusting, dog, family
How do you make a cat be a dog? Pour gasoline on it and light it with a match. It will go 'WOOF.'
Vote: has 13.54 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, cat, dog