Joke #10040

What do cows do when they re introduced? They give each other a milk shake.
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has 55.71 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal

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A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. "I'm so ashamed, and dirty Doctor," she said, "I guess I let myself go." The physician was checking hers eyes and ears. "Don't feel ashamed, Miss. You don't look that bad." "Do you really think so, Doctor?" she asked. The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face and said, "Of course. Now just open your mouth and say moo."
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has 32.95 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, doctor, women
A man is walking home when he sees a dog buying meat for his owner. The man watches the dog when the butcher takes a little to much and growls and him until he gets the right amount. The man follows the dog and watches as the dog stands on two legs and helps an old lady across the street. Amazed the man follows the dog home and watches the dog ring the doorbell. When the owner comes to the door the owner takes the bags and tells the dog to stay in the front yard. Frustrated the man goes up to the owner and yells "This dog is amazing! He gets your groceries, makes sure you have the exact change, helps old ladies across the street and this is how you treat him!" The owner replies, "I know but,this is the 3rd time this week he left his keys".
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What do you call a snake who works for the government? A: A civil serpent.
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, political
Why couldn't the skunk use her phone? It was out of odor!
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has 20.20 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
When a bull wants to listen to a cassette, what does he put on his head? Steer phones.
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has 42.25 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, music
When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.
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has 48.79 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
What did the customer say to the pet shop assistant after buying a bunny? Rabbit up nicely, it's a gift.
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has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, customer service
A frog goes into a bank, and hops up on the desk of the loan officer. ''Hi,'' he croaks. ''What's your name?'' The loan officer says, ''My name is John Paddywack. May I help you?'' ''Yeah,'' says the frog. ''I'd like to borrow some money.'' The loan officer finds this a little odd, but gets out a form. ''Okay,what's your name?'' The frog replies, ''Kermit Jagger.'' ''Really?'' says the loan officer. ''Any relation to Mick Jagger?'' ''Yeah, he's my dad.'' ''Hmmm,'' says the loan officer. ''Do you have any collateral?'' The frog hands over a pink ceramic elephant and asks, ''Will this do?'' The loan officer says, ''Um, I'm not sure. Let me go check with the bank manager.'' ''Oh, tell him I said hi,'' adds the frog. ''He knows me.'' The loan officer goes back to the manager and says, ''Excuse me, sir, but there's a frog out there named Kermit Jagger who wants to borrow some money. All he has for collateral is this pink elephant thing; I'm not even sure what it is.'' The manager says: ''It's a knick-knack, Paddywack, give the frog a loan; his old man's a Rolling Stone.''
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has 59.95 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: animal, celebrity, money, music
"Name?" "Abdul Aziz." "Sex?" "Three to five times a day." "No, no... I mean male or female?" "Yes, male, female, sometimes camel." "Holy cow!" "Yes, cow, sheep, animals in general." "But isn't that hostile?" "Horse style, doggy style, any style!" "Oh dear!" "No, no! Deer run too fast..."
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has 75.88 % from 1117 votes. More jokes about: animal, sex
What's the difference between a mosquito and a woman? When you slap a mosquito it stops sucking.
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has 45.24 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, sex, women