What do cows do when they re introduced?
They give each other a milk shake.
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Why didn't the teddy bear eat his lunch?
(Because he was stuffed!)
Q: Why do cops arrest black people?
A: Because monkeys belong in cages.
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A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan.
He asks, "What was that for?"
She says, "I found a piece of paper in your pocket with Betty Sue written on it."
He says, "Jeez, honey, remember last week when I went to the track? Betty Sue was the name of the horse I went there to bet on."
She shrugs and walks away.
Three days later he is reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan.
He asks, "What was that for?"
She answers, "Your horse called."
What do cows like to do at amoosement parks?
Ride on the roller cowster.
Q: Why does a dog stay in a shadow.
A: Because it doesn't want to be a Hotdog.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a gorilla?
An animal that puts you out at night.
A city child came running into the farmhouse.
“No wonder that mama pig is so big,” she yelled.
“There’s a bunch of little pigs out there blowing her up!”
Q: Why is a blonde like a turtle?
A: They both get fucked up when they're on their backs.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, her face looks like a horse's ass flapping in the breeze.