Joke #10098

Did you hear about the snobby cow? She thought she was a cutlet above the rest.

"I can't decide whether to buy a bicycle or a cow for my farm." "Well, wouldn't you look silly riding a cow?" "I d look a darn sight sillier trying to milk a bicycle!"

What's the definition of a nervous breakdown? A chameleon on a tartan rug.

What job do rabbits at hotels have? Bellhop.

A stallion and a mare where due to get married, but the stallion didn't show up at the church. He got colt feet.

‘Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that’s how dogs spend their lives.’ Sue Murphy

Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales? He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.

Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'" Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken." Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?" Mother: "Because we need the eggs."

A man and his little boy were walking through the park when a honeybee landed near them. The boy ran over and stomped on it. The father gave him a lecture about having respect for living things and added, "Just for that you can’t have any honey for two weeks!" Pretty soon a butterfly landed near them. The boy ran over and stomped on it. Again, the father gave him a lecture and added, "Just for that you can’t have any butter for two weeks!" When they got home, they went into the kitchen, and a cockroach ran across the floor. The mother ran over and stomped on it. The boy said to his father, "Well do you want to tell her, or shall I?"

Does running out of a burning barn make a cow unusual? No, only medium rare.

Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.