Joke #5177

Q: Why do pandas like old movies? A: Because they are black and white.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
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has 34.87 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal
What did the mooron say when he saw the milk cartons in the grass? "Hey! Look at the cow's nest!"
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has 42.25 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call a dinosaur that's a noisy sleeper? A Brontosnorus.
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has 26.98 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: animal
The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and tells whether you are qualified to be a "manager". The questions are not that difficult. 1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Wrong Answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant and close the refrigerator. Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions. 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend except one. Which animal doesn't attend? Correct Answer: The Elephant. The Elephant is in the refrigerator. This tests your memory. OK, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your abilities. 4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it? Correct Answer: You swim across. All the Crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting! This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes. According to Andersen Consulting World wide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong. But many pre-schoolers got several correct answers. Andersen Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most management consultants have the brains of a four-year-old.
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has 80.43 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, management, memory, work
Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris created the platypus by roundhouse kicking a duck at a beaver.
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has 62.88 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, duck
George was taking care of a parrot for his aunt. This parrot was a very nasty parrot. It cussed and screamed and made fun of George, so he took the parrot and put it in the freezer. The parrot kept screaming and insulting George until finally it stopped. George thought to himself, “On no! I froze my aunt’s bird to death.” He opened the door and saw the bird alive! The bird said, “I’m sorry for my behaviour and will never act up again. George said, “Why the change?” The bird answered, “Because I saw what you did to the other bird."
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, death, parrot
Q: What kind of bees make milk instead of honey? A: Boo-bees.
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has 66.57 % from 532 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, sex
Where do milk shakes come from? Nervous cows.
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has 71.25 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Some scientists decided to do the following experiments on a dog. For the first experiment, they cut one of the dog's legs off, then they told the dog to walk. The dog got up and walked, so they they learned that a dog could walk with just three legs. For the second experiment, they cut off a second leg from the dog, then they told the dog once more to walk. The dog was still able to walk with only two legs. For the third experiment, they cut off yet another leg from the dog and once more they told the dog to walk. However, the dog wasn't able to walk with only one leg. As a result of these three experiments, the scientists wrote in their final report that the dog had lost it's hearing after having three legs cut off.
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has 41.91 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, science