Joke #10395

Why are rabbits never gold? How would you tell them apart from goldfish?
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep? A stripey sweater.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
A zebra has wondered his whole life whether he was a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes. When he dies and goes to heaven he asks God the question "Am I a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes?" God responds, "You are what you are" The zebra goes to his friends and tells them what God had said and that he still doesn't know the answer to his question. One of his friends says, "Well, that means you are a white zebra with black stripes" The zebra asks him why and the friend says, "Because otherwise God would have said 'You is what you is'"
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has 65.20 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: animal, god, life, racist
Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call the reindeer with one eye higher than the other? Isaiah.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal
‘I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he’s gone.’ Steven Wright
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has 39.32 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
If you had a gun and you were being chased by a bull and a mountain lion, which one would you shoot first? The mountain lion. You can always shoot the bull.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal
A dog walks into a pub, and takes a seat. He says to the barman, "Can I have a pint of lager and a packet of crisps please". The barman says, "Wow, that's amazing! You should join the circus!" The dog replies, "Why? Do they need electricians?"
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has 74.72 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, bartender, dog
What's a teddy bears favourite pasta? Tagliateddy.
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
Once upon a time, there was a cat who died. When she got to heaven, God asked her how she liked being on earth. She told the Lord that it was awful, she had to sleep in cold back alleys where there was no food and life was hard. God told her that he was sorry it had had turned out that way but here, in heaven, she would be happy and He would give her the most comfortable, warm pillow to sleep on. The cat laid down upon the pillow and was happy. A few days later, about a dozen mice that came to heaven together and God asked them how they had liked earth. Earth was no better for them than it was the cat. They explained to God that it was tough and exhausting and their feet were worn out from always running from cats and dogs and people. God felt bad for the mice and decided to give them rollerskates. One day God sees the cat again and asked her how she was liking heaven. She explained that it was absolutely wonderful. The pillow he gave her was the most comfortable place that she had ever slept on, but even better than the pillow were the meals on wheels.
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has 79.35 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why was the skunk angry? He was incensed.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal