What happened to the cold jellyfish?
It set.
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Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A. "How do you breathe through something so small?"
Q: What does an elephant use as tampon?
A: A sheep.
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Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.
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Q: Why was the Easter Bunny so upset?
A: He was having a bad hare day!
Q. How do rednecks have safe sex?
A. They mark the sheep that kick!
Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and as he enters, notices a horse and the end of the bar with a sign on it.
Out of curiosity, he approaches the bartender and asks what the deal is with the horse at the end of the bar.
The bartender tells him: "The sign says if you can make the horse laugh you'll win $50. Take note though that hundreds of people have tried and no-one has been able to do it."
"Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back."
So he walks to the end of the bar, whispers something into the horse's ear, and within seconds the horse is laughing hysterically.
"That's amazing," said the bartender.
"Tell you what, if you can make him cry I'll double your winnings."
"Get out the money," says Chuck," I'll be right back."
So Chuck walked again over to the horse, came back to the bartender 2 minutes later, and the horse was balling and sobbing like a baby.
"Well," replied Chuck Norris, "First I told him a had a bigger d*ck than he did. Then I showed him."
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Which rabbit was a famous female aviator?
Amelia Harehart.
What did one slug say to another who had hit him and rushed off?
I ll get you next slime.
Chuck Norris was mauled by a bear once, then the bear woke up and apologized.
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Mohan (to the doctor): "Doctor, can you diagnose my Illness?"
Doctor: "Your eyesight seems to be poor."
Mohan: "How did you come to that conclusion?"
Doctor: "You seemed to have missed noticing the sign, hung outside. This is a veterinary hospital."