How do you make a small fortune out of horses?
Start off with a large fortune!
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
So he can make you curious.
Q:Why do ducks have webbed feet?
A:To stamp out fires.
Q:Why do elephants have flat feet?
A:To stamp out burning ducks
Patty was sitting in her back yard digging a hole to bury her dead goldfish. Mrs. Johnson, who lived next door, was watching her over the fence.
Mrs. Johnson said, "Patty, what are you doing?"
Patty said, "I'm digging a hole to bury my dead goldfish."
Mrs. Johnson said, "Patty, don't you think that hole is a little BIG for a goldfish?"
Patty said, "No...it's inside your damn cat!"
What is a moo hoo for steak that came late?
Filet delay.
Two cows were talking in the field.
One cow says, "Have you heard about the Mad Cow disease that's going around?"
The other cow answers, "Yeah, makes you glad you're a penguin, doesn"t it?"
How can you tell a rabbit from a skunk?
A skunk uses a cheaper deodorant.
I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.
What did the bee say to the flower?
"Hi, honey."
Q: What type of bees make milk?
A: Boo-bees.