What do the latest Iphone 6 applications do? Whiten teeth and perform laser eye surgery!
A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen". The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them". Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now".
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "Great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
The 21st century: Deleting history is more important than making it.
If the box says: "This software requires Windows XP or better" Does that mean it'LL run on Linux?
"Have you got the address of the butter website?" "Yes, but don't spread it around."
E-mail returned to sender, insufficient voltage.
Funny facts about Google users: 50% of people use Google well as a search engine. The rest 50% of them use it to check if their internet is connected
Q: What does an SEO and part-time chiropractor work on? A: Your bad backlinks.
Q: What will my computer printer warranty cover? A: Your mouse pad.
Before Instagram, I used to waste so much time sitting around having to imagine what my friends' food looked like.