Joke #11362

What do you call an accountant with an opinion? An auditor.
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has 82.28 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: accountant

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Q: Who makes the best detective - Sherlock Holmes or a tax accountant? A: The tax accountant - she make's more deductions.
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Did you hear about the cannibal Tax Accountant? She charges an arm and a leg.
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A mugger stops a guy on the street at gunpoint. "Give me all your money", he says. The muggee isindignant. "You can't do this," he yells. "I'm anIRS agent." "In that case," says the mugger, "give me all MY money."
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The young accounting graduate, fresh out of uni and knowing everything, applied for his first job. The prospective employer asked him what starting salary he was looking for. "Oh, around $100,000 a year, depending on the benefits package." "Well, how does this sound? Five weeks annual leave, 22.5% superannuation, paid expenses to overseas conferences every year, home telephone reimbursed and a company car replaced every 20,000 kilometers, say a Mercedes convertible." The graduate sat up straight and tried not to look excited. "Wow. Are you kidding?" "Yeah. But you started it."
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has 75.20 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: accountant, graduation, mean, money, work
A Martian lands to plunder, pillage and burn. He goes up to the owner of the first house he sees and says, "I'm a Martian just arrived from the other side of the galaxy. We're here to destroy your civilization, pillage and burn. What do you think about that?" The owner replies, "I don't have an opinion. I'm a chartered accountant."
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What does CPA stand for? Can't Pass Again.
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: accountant
A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
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has 80.31 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: accountant, money, tax, work
A businessman tells his friend that his company is looking for a new accountant. His friend asks, "Didn't your company hire a new accountant a few weeks ago?" The businessman replies, "That's the accountant we're looking for."
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has 72.56 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: accountant, business, time, work
Q: What's a shy and retiring accountant? A: An accountant who is half a million shy and that's why he's retiring.
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What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people don't? Depreciation.
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has 72.95 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: accountant, math