Joke #11457

Father's Day always worried James. He was afraid that he will get a gift he can't afford.
Vote:
has 72.56 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, money

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Happy Father's Day! I got you a present but if you want to get technical then technically you bought it. By the way, can I borrow $20?
Vote:
has 69.86 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, kids, money
"Dad, your Father's Day gift is another year of not having to pay for my wedding."
Vote:
has 67.52 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, kids, money, wedding
A horse walks into a bar. He walks up to the bartender and says "Give me a beer." The bartender is stunned, so he heads to the back of the bar to speak with the owner. "Hey boss" he says, "there's a horse in the bar asking for a beer." The bar owner pauses for a second, then replies "Well then give him one, but charge him double. Horses don't know the price of beer." So the bartender heads back out front and hands the horse a beer. "You know," says the barkeep, "we don't get many horses around here." To which the horse replies, "At these prices I'm not surprised."
Vote:
has 74.05 % from 110 votes. More jokes about: bar, bartender, beer, horse, money
I'm so broke, I don't even get excited when I find money because I'm sure I owe it to someone.
Vote:
has 74.36 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: black humor, money
Mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day. What do single guys have? Palm Sunday.
Vote:
has 70.80 % from 101 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, sex, single
Little Johnny came home from school one day slightly confused. His mother was Jewish and his father was Hispanic. So Johnny says, "Mum, am I more Jewish or more Hispanic?" "What does it really matter? You’ll just have to ask your father", his mother tells him. So Johnny’s father gets home from work and Johnny asks the same question, "Dad, am I more Jewish or more Hispanic?" "What kind of a question is that, does it really matter? Why do you want to know if you’re more Jewish or more Hispanic?" asks his dad. "Well, it’s like this dad. Tommy down the street wants to sell his bicycle for $50, I don’t know whether to talk him down to $25, or wait till dark and steel the fucking thing!"
Vote:
has 75.52 % from 645 votes. More jokes about: jewish, little Johnny, money, school
Happy Father's Day to someone who knew long before me that all the boys I brought home were jerks.
Vote:
has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, kids, love
Happy Father's Day to the only person on the planet still willing to employ me.
Vote:
has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, kids, work
Happy Father's Day to a dad who was smart enough to teach me how to mow the lawn so he would't have to.
Vote:
has 67.64 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, kids, teacher, work
By tradition, fathers wear a red flower on Father's Day, if their father is alive and a white flower if he's dead. And if they have a nagging wife and a house full of screaming kids, they wear a pink flower - which means they are living but wish they were dead.
Vote:
has 76.80 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: dad, death, Fathers day, life