Q: What is the difference between a dogs ass and liberals? A: Nancy Pelosi won't kiss a dogs ass!
The Democrats have a lot of contenders for the presidential election in 2020. This includes Anthony Weiner and Eric Holder - we are already seeing bumper stickers that say "WEINER HOLDER 2020".
Q: What do you call a Democratic buffet? A: A free for all.
Why did President Clinton name his dog Buddy instead of Spot? Because he didn't want people running around the White House saying, "come Spot, come Spot!"
Q: How do you know that Democrats are a diverse people? A: Because they keep count of how many people they know in each racial or ethnic category.
Starbucks is offering a new drink to honor Nancy Pelosi. They call it the "fullacrapuccino".
A Democrat walks into a doctor's office with a frog sitting on his head. The frog looks at the doctor and says, "Hey doc, can you get this wart off my ass?
Q: What do you get when you cross a pilgrim with a democrat? A: A god-fearing tax collector who gives thanks for what other people have.
One day the teacher was asking the class about there weekends. She asked sue, "how was your weekend?" "Good." Then little Johnny waved his hand "me, me, me." Finally giving in said, "what did you do this weekend?" "I rode in my wagon pulled by my dog and hit a steep hill. The wagon started going faster than the dog and the handle went up his ass." "Rectum is the word you're looking for," she says. "Rectum," said Johnny, "da man near killed him."
Q: What's the difference between Elvis and a smart Liberal? A: Elvis has been sighted.
If you give three liberals a light bulb what would happen? The first one would say its causing global warming. The second one would say its racist. The third one would say its not a light bulb unless Obama says let there be light.