Joke #11788

Q: What do a gang member and a redneck have in common? A: They both know how to throw a good hoe down.

Would you take a bullet for the last person you had sex with? Anything for the family.

A redneck calls up the White House and tells the receptionist: "I'd like to become the next President of the United States." The receptionist: "What are you, an idiot?" Redneck: "Why, is it required?"

So a dude turns to the guy next to him at a bar and asks, "Hey, you wanna hear a redneck story?" The guy says, "Buddy, I'm six feet, 210 pounds, an' ma name's Billy Joe. You see the guy on the other side of you? That there's Bubba. He's 225 pounds of solid muscle and he's a redneck. And the boy next to him? Mike's a trucker who weighs 295 and he's a redneck, too. Now, do you still want to tell your redneck story?" The fella says, "Naw, you're right... I'd hate to have to explain it three times!"

Cloyd went to a Charleston dentist complaining his gums had shriveled up and his teeth were falling out. After examining him, the dentist said, "Your mouth is really bad. Do you brush?" "Ah sure do!" replied Cloyd. "Everee single day!" "What do you brush with?" asked the dentist. "Preparation H," said the redneck.

Q: What do a tornado and a redneck divorce have in common? A: In the end, someone is going to lose a trailer.

You know you're a redneck if your house still has the "WIDE LOAD" sign on the back.

Q: What do a tornado and a redneck divorce have in common? A: In the end, someone is going to lose a trailer.

Q: Did you hear about the redneck who passed away and left everything to his beloved widow? A: She can't touch it till she's fourteen.

Q: How does a redneck tell the difference between a bull and a cow in the dark? A: He sticks his nose in the animal's ass. If there's a place for his tongue, it's a cow.

You might be a redneck if the Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.