Q: What do a gang member and a redneck have in common?
A: They both know how to throw a good hoe down.
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You might be a redneck if the Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.
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A redneck calls up the White House and tells the receptionist: "I'd like to become the next President of the United States."
The receptionist: "What are you, an idiot?"
Redneck: "Why, is it required?"
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Whats the cheapest type of meat that a redneck can buy?
Deer balls, they're under a buck.
Q: What do you call a redneck virgin?
A: A 7 year old that can run faster than her brothers.
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
You might be a redneck if a police officer pulls you over to ask for your driver's license and your address is the county jail.
Half dressed redneck couple sitting on a couch watching the news on TV with man's arm around the woman.
The man says "Lookit them homo-sekshuls a ruining the sanctity of our institution.
"We oughta go to San Francisco just to show them liberals that marriage means one man, one woman. "
"Right, Darlin."
The woman replies, "That's right, Daddy."
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Q: What do you call a holy redneck with absolutely no family?
A: The Sole inbred.
Would you take a bullet for the last person you had sex with?
Anything for the family.
The July temperature in Joplin climbed over the one hundred mark.
Despite the scorching heat, Bozell was outside painting his house.
A passerby stopped for a moment to watch him and then asked, "How cum yer wearin' two jackets?"
"'Cause," said the redneck, "the directions on the can say ta put on two coats!"