Joke #11917

I find it interesting that if you rearrange the letters in the word "Mother-in-law" you get the words "Woman Hitler".
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has 72.97 % from 374 votes. More jokes about: Hitler, mother in law, wife

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The newlywed wife said to her husband when he returned from work, “I have great news for you. Pretty soon, we’re going to be three in this house instead of two.” Her husband ran to her with a smile on his face and delight in his eyes. He was glowing of happiness and kissing his wife when she said, “I’m glad that you feel this way since tomorrow morning, my mother moves in with us.”
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has 80.40 % from 481 votes. More jokes about: husband, marriage, mother in law, wife, work
A man is driving with his wife at his side and his mother-in-law in the backseat. The women just won’t leave him alone. His mother-in-law says, "You’re driving too fast!" His wife says, "Stay more to the left." After ten mixed orders, the man turns to his wife and asks, "Who’s driving this car – you or your mother?"
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has 79.60 % from 414 votes. More jokes about: car, marriage, mother in law, wife
A drunk man comes inside a bar and says, "Happy New Year everybody." and the waiter says, "We are in June you drunk man." And the drunk man says, "Oh my god my wife is going to kill me I have never been so late in my life!"
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has 63.49 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, drunk, new year, wife
10 things men don't say 1)Let's watch Lifetime. 2)Sex is overrated. 3)I don't want to go too far on the first date. 4)Yes, your sister does have bigger breasts than you. 5)Don't we owe your mother a visit? 6)I'm relieved I don't have a large penis weighing me down. 7)Dessert goes right to my hips. 8)I hate when I miss Oprah. 9)Does this suit make me look fat? 10)I'll never get tired of listening to Dido.
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has 32.77 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: men, mother in law, music, sex
Bert took his Saint Bernard to the vet. "Doctor," he said sadly, "I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to cut off my dog's tail." The vet stepped back, "Bert, why should I do such a terrible thing?" "Because my mother-in-law's arriving tomorrow, and I don't want anything to make her think she's welcome."
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has 73.41 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: animal, doctor, mother in law
Hitler got a heart attack when he saw the gas bill.
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has 47.47 % from 126 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Hitler, money
One of Hitler's assistants says to him one day, "Sir, we're mining too many useless ores." Hitler replies, "Well, mine less." A grammar nazi then bursts through the door and shouts, "Mine FEWER!" Hitler looks up and asks, "Yes?"
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has 67.19 % from 144 votes. More jokes about: Hitler
Overheard in a restaurant: She: "This wine is described as full bodied and imposing with a nutty base, a sharp bite, and a bitter aftertaste." He: "Are you describing the wine or your mother?"
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has 62.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, mother in law, wine
Q: Why did hitter kill himself? A: Because he could not pay the gas bill.
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has 33.63 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Hitler, money, morbid
I kind a feel sorry for Hitler. Looking back at some old photos of him, his friends always left him hanging when he went for a high-five.
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has 69.62 % from 321 votes. More jokes about: friendship, Hitler, memory