Joke #12017

"And so, God came forth and proclaimed widescreen is the best" Sony 16:9
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has 50.89 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: bible, god, technology

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A man was robbing a house in the middle of the night. All of a sudden, he heard a parrot cry out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber ignored it, and takes the TV. Again, the parrot cries out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber started to get a little worried. "What's your name, birdie?" "Moses." "What dumbass named you Moses?" "The same dumbass who called his rottweiler Jesus."
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has 73.68 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: animal, god, parrot, technology
Little Johnny was in bible study one morning. Sally was sleeping in front of johnny. The teacher asked Sally who our Lord and savior was. Little Johnny poked her in the butt with a pin and she screamed "Jesus Christ!" And fell back to sleep. A little while later the teacher asked Sally who created our world. Johnny poked her in the butt again and Sally screamed "oh my god!" And fell back to sleep. Later the teacher asked Sally what Eve said to Adam after they had their fifth child. Johnny poked her in the butt and Sally screamed "if you stick that thing in me one more time I'm gonna break it!"
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has 65.18 % from 170 votes. More jokes about: bible, god, little Johnny, teacher
Jesus walks into a hotel, rings the bell, and waits for the receptionist to come out. He looks her dead in the eye, slams three nails on the counter, and says, "Can you put me up for the night?"
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has 37.61 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: god, life
Chuck Norris round house kicked the xbox and made the xbox 360.
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has 52.42 % from 122 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, technology
Q: Why Are black peoples hands and feet white? A: When God painted them he told them to assume the position
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has 34.47 % from 115 votes. More jokes about: black people, god
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator? A: The blonde works in the dark!
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has 61.43 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, math, technology
Q: How many people can you fit in one Honda? A: Well, the Bible said that all 12 disciples were in one Accord.
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has 73.25 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: bible, car, catholic
Q: How do you know when an Asian robs your house? A: Your technology has been upgraded, your homework is finished, but he's still trying to back out of your drive way.
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has 53.95 % from 124 votes. More jokes about: asian, driving, school, technology
A newlywed couple lay in bed one morning husband says: "How about you go brew us some coffee?" Wife: "That's your job." Hasband: "Says who?" Wife : "The bible, it's on just about every page." Husband: "The bible don't say anything about brewing coffee." Wife (Holding her Bible flipping pages): "See every page Hebrews, Hebrews, hebrews."
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has 69.92 % from 113 votes. More jokes about: bible, marriage, religious
There's a rumor that Steve Jobs, has been a Buddhist, has been reincarnated as a factory worker on a sweatshop assembly line in China.
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has 59.80 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, geography, life, technology, work