My mother-in- law is so cross-eyed, that when she cries the tears roll down her back!
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10 things men don't say
1)Let's watch Lifetime.
2)Sex is overrated.
3)I don't want to go too far on the first date.
4)Yes, your sister does have bigger breasts than you.
5)Don't we owe your mother a visit?
6)I'm relieved I don't have a large penis weighing me down.
7)Dessert goes right to my hips.
8)I hate when I miss Oprah.
9)Does this suit make me look fat?
10)I'll never get tired of listening to Dido.
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Yo mamas teeth are so yellow she helped Dorothy get to the emerald city.
Your momma's like a shotgun 2 cocks and shes ready to blow.
So David Is finally engaged, and is excited to show off his new bride.
"Ma", he said to his Mother, "I'm going to bring home three girls and I want you to guess which one is my fiance."
Sure enough twenty minutes later, David walks in the door with three girls following behind him.
"It's that one", said his mother, without blinking an eye.
"Holy cow", exclaimed David, "how in the world did you know it was her?"
"I just don't like her", she replied.
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I really do have a soft spot for my MIL.
It's out in the garden behind the garage.
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Yo Mama's so loose it's like throwing a hotdog down a hallway.
Yo' Mama is so fat, she gets her nails done at the auto shop.
A man met a wonderful woman and became engaged to her.
He called his mother to share his good news with her.
He arranged to have dinner with his mother that evening so that she could meet his fiancee.
When he arrived at her home, he brought along three women - a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead.
His mother inquired as to why he had brought three women, instead of just one.
He replied that he wanted to see if his mother would be able to guess which one of the women was her future daughter-in-law.
She looked at each one carefully and then replied: "It's the redhead."
"How could you possibly have figured that out so quickly?" he inquired.
She coldly replied, "Because I can't stand her."
Knock-knock
Who is there?
A shattered penis with many diseases.
What kind of illness?
Gall, Aids, Gonorrhea, Syphilis...
Enough, it is the best present for my mother in law.
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Joke has 63.58 % from 608 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health, knock-knock, mother in law, vulgar
