My mother-in- law is so cross-eyed, that when she cries the tears roll down her back!
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A man met a wonderful woman and became engaged to her.
He called his mother to share his good news with her.
He arranged to have dinner with his mother that evening so that she could meet his fiancee.
When he arrived at her home, he brought along three women - a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead.
His mother inquired as to why he had brought three women, instead of just one.
He replied that he wanted to see if his mother would be able to guess which one of the women was her future daughter-in-law.
She looked at each one carefully and then replied: "It's the redhead."
"How could you possibly have figured that out so quickly?" he inquired.
She coldly replied, "Because I can't stand her."
Yo momma so fat and stupid, her waist size is larger than her IQ!
Yo mamma’s so hairy, last night I confused here with a bush and pissed on her!
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I was at a magic show, when after one particularly amazing trick, someone screamed out, "wow, how did you do that."
I would tell you", answered the magician predictably, "but then I'd have to kill you."
After a moments pause the same voice screamed out "can you tell my mother in law?"
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Your mama's so stupid when she saw a bus with lots of white kids in it she said stop that Twinkie.
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My mother in law was complaining about her dentures to me.
She told: "Whenever I get overweight it'll be a stench; when I make myself thin it would be stretched; when something squeezes in it then I 'll faint from enjoyment!"
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Yo mamma is so fat when she tried to go to McDonald's she tripped over Wendy's and landed on Burger King.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, I asked if her face hurt because it was killing me.
Q: What is the worst thing an emergency doctor can tell you after admitting your MIL?
A: Sir, we were able to save her!
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Toilets are like mothers-in-law:
the farther away the better.
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