Sorry, I'm late.
I was trying to think of ways to get out of this.
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A man is walking through the wood and he meets a really ugly, big and a fat frog.
The frog says: "Hello, prince if you kiss me, I will fulfill you one wish. You can wish whatever you want."
The man says: "Ok, I will kiss you."
He kisses the frog, he has told her his wish but nothing has happened.
And the frog said: "Now you can see, such an old man and still believes in fairy tales."
The whole idea of Jesus dying to pay for our sins is bullshit.
Jews don't pay for anything.
I was drinking my coffee in a coffeehouse when a beautiful girl came near my table and asked me:
"Are you alone?"
So I responded: "It's a long time that I'm alone."
"So do you mind me to take this chair?" said the girl.
I fainted...
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My ex-girlfriend loves the heat.
She has a nostalgia for hell.
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"I'm sorry for throwing red wine over all your dresses in the wardrobe last night," I told my girlfriend. "I've spent all day getting the stains out just to show how much you mean to me."
"Oh, that's really nice," she said. "What did you use to remove the stains?"
"Scissors," I replied.
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I will be unable to delete all the emails you send me until I return from vacation.
Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
Yo mama is so fake even China denied that they made her.
Q: VWhy didn't the fixed dog cross the road?
A: Because he didn't have the balls to do it.
Me: "I love you."
You: "Is that you or the wine talking?"
Me: "It's me talking to the wine."
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