When Chuck Norris comes into your house, you are the guest.
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Before the 16th century, the sun really did go around the earth.
Chuck Norris just decided to change it as a prank.
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Chuck Norris doesn't daydream.
He's too busy giving other people nightmares.
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Got said, "Let there be light!"
Chuck Norris looked at him and said: "Say please."
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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
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Chuck Norris can skip a track on a cassette.
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Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child.
The bed went itself out of fear.
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Q: What does a black person have that is white?
A: His owner!
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Two boys have taken part in IQ tests at the well-known psychologist.
The first boy has opened the door after 30 minutes of testing and has screamed: "wow, perfect, unbelievable, I have 60 points, I have 60 points!"
After another 30 minutes has opened the door the second boy and has screamed: "wow, super, I have 62 points, I have 62 points!"
They sat down and asked each other: "and what does it mean, that you have 60 points and I have 62 points? Let us ask the psychologist what does it mean?"
The psychologist has said: "the 60 and 62 points means that you are both idiots."
Q: Why does California have the most lawyers, and New Jersey, the most toxic waste dumps?
A: New Jersey got first pick.
When Chuck goes into outer space his head doesn't pop, space pops around his head!
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