Joke #13534

Yo mama so ugly that the football team yelled at her to get out of the bus.
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has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: communication, football, mean, ugly, Yo mama

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Susan's mother: "What are you doing on the top of that tree?" Susan: "Some boys are playing football their ball is fallen on the tree. They asked me to bring it." Susan's mother: "My dear , they only want to chech your pants." Susan: "Don't worry mam, I hav'nt put on my pants!"
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has 85.07 % from 164 votes. More jokes about: dirty, football, kids, mean
Wife: "Give me some money. I want to buy a bra." Husband: "Why? You have nothing to put in it!" Wife: "You wear shorts!"
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has 83.05 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: beauty, communication, marriage, mean, money
Yo momma so ugly she threw a boomerang and it refused to come back.
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has 82.29 % from 7757 votes. More jokes about: insulting, ugly, Yo mama
The wife and I had come to town to pick up a few things. We came out of one store and saw a cop writing a ticket for illegal parking right in front of us on the curb. So we asked him nicely to give a couple of retirees a break. But he paid us no attention and kept writing. Just loud enough for him to hear, my wife said, "What a Bozo." The cop looked up, stared at my wife, then started writing out another ticket. I said, "Honey, this guy probably just learned to read and write, and he's so proud of himself, he's showing off." The cop tore off the 2nd ticket and started on a third. We kept making comments and he kept writing tickets till he was up to about half a dozen. Finally, glaring at us, the cop left, and we walked on down the street. We didn't care about the tickets. We always take the bus into town, and anyway, that car was one of those obnoxious Hummers. Being retired, we always try to find ways to keep ourselves amused. We feel it's important.
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has 81.89 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: communication, cop, mean, old people, vulgar
I was sat with my wife while she sipped on her glass of wine, when she said, "I love you so much, you know. I don't know how I could ever live without you." I said, "Is that you or the wine talking?" She said, "It's me talking to the wine.
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has 81.65 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: communication, love, mean, wife, wine
Q: What do you call a bunch of millionaires sitting around watching the Super Bowl on TV? A: The Dallas Cowboys.
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has 81.40 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: communication, cowboy, football, money, sport
Yo mama so ugly when Santa came down the chimney he said ho! ho! hoooollly shit!
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has 81.27 % from 5282 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, college, Santa, ugly, Yo mama
Me: "I love you." You: "Is that you or the wine talking?" Me: "It's me talking to the wine."
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has 80.86 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: communication, love, mean, wine
Yo' Mama is so ugly, her imaginary friend played with other kids.
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has 80.21 % from 774 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kids, ugly, Yo mama
Yo mama's so fat when she stepped on a scale it said: "A.B.C.D.E.F.G get your fat ass off of me."
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has 80.13 % from 157 votes. More jokes about: communication, fat, insulting, vulgar, Yo mama