Joke #1436

Q: Why are black peoples nostrils so big? A: Because that's what God held them by when he was painting them.
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has 22.94 % from 245 votes. More jokes about: dirty, god

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Two nuns are walking back to the convent at night when two men push them into a dark alley and start having sex with them. One nun says "God, forgive them for they know not what they are doing!" The second nun says "Speak for yours! Mine is a Master!"
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has 80.10 % from 214 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, god, religious, sex
Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together. The first one tells her friends, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father.'" The second Catholic woman chirps, "My son is a Bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Grace.'" The third Catholic woman says smugly, "My son is a Cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, people say, 'Your Eminence.'" The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence. The first three women give her this subtle "Well…?" She replies, "My son is a gorgeous, 6’2, hard bodied stripper. When he walks into a room, people say, 'Oh my God…'"
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has 78.01 % from 314 votes. More jokes about: catholic, dirty, food, god, priest
One day a group of engineers got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. They picked one engineer to go and tell Him that they were done with Him. The engineer walked up to God and said, "God, we've decided that we no longer need you. We're to the point that we can clone people and do many miraculous things, so why don't you just go on and get lost." God listened patiently to the man and after the engineer was done talking, God said, "Very well! How about this? Let's have a man-making contest." The man replied, "Okay, great!" But God added, "Now we're going to do this just like I did back in the old days with Adam." The engineers said, "Sure, no problem." He bent down and grabbed himself a handful of dirt. God just looked at him and said, "No, no, no. Go get your own dirt!"
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has 64.21 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: dirty, god, science
Your beauty is why God invented eyeballs, but your booty is why God invented my balls!
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has 56.42 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: beauty, dirty, flirt, god, sex
A nun with big boobs boarded a bus and sat near a dude. The dude kept looking at the nun's boobs. The nun realized this. She held her rosary and asked, "Are you looking at Jesus on the cross?" The man said "No, I'm looking at the 2 thieves beside him."
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has 52.26 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: dirty, god
Why did God give women belly buttons? For somewhere to stash your gum on the way down.
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has 35.87 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: dirty, god
What did God say when he made the first niggers? Oops! Burnt another one!
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has 54.20 % from 350 votes. More jokes about: black people, god
Three old men were sitting around talking about who had the worst health problems. The seventy-year-old said, "Have I got a problem. Every morning I get up at 7:30 and have to take a piss, but I have to stand at the toilet for an hour 'cause my pee barely trickles out." "Heck, that's nothing, " said the eighty year old. "Every morning at 8:30 I have to take a shit, but I have to sit on the can for hours because of my constipation. It's terrible". The ninety-year-old said, "You guys think you have problems! Every morning at 7:30 I piss like a racehorse, and at 8:30 I shit like a pig. The trouble with me is, I don't wake up till eleven."
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has 78.00 % from 452 votes. More jokes about: age, dirty, time
Yo mama so fat when god said let there be light she was told to move out of the way.
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has 41.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: fat, god, Yo mama
Q: What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel say? A: Beat it. We're closed.
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has 81.72 % from 107 votes. More jokes about: business, dirty, mean, vulgar