Nothing spreads easier than butter, except for yo mommas legs.
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My girlfriend always calls me a pedophile, and all I can think is "Wow that is a big word for a nine year old."
Listening to censored hip-hop is like going to a whore for a hug.
What do your parents' car and testicles have in common?
Hit either one of them and you're grounded.
What said Adam to Eva at they’re first rendezvous?
Get back!
I have no idea how big it grows!
( boy 1 ) : you need to say what ever i say in backwards.
( boy 2 ) : okay.
( boy 1 ) : A B C
( boy 2 ) : C B A
( boy 1 ) : 1 2 3
( boy 2 ) : 3 2 1
( boy 1 ) : okay lets make this harder : CRACK MY FINGER
( Boy 2 ) : Finger my crack .
Q: Why was the dirty old man fired from the poultry shop?
A: He couldn't keep his hands off the breasts and thighs.
Q: What do tofu and a dildo have in common?
A: They are both meat substitutes.
Vote:
When Viagra first came out my wife and I decided to give it a go to see what all the fuss was about.
I popped the pill and waited the 15 minutes and then it was on for young and old.
We timed the performance to the minute and it all finally subsided at 3 hours and 17 minutes.
I asked the missus what she thought and she simply stated that she couldn't understand what all the hype was about for an extra 17 minutes...
Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A: A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it...
Robinson came home in great excitement and said to his wife, “You’ll never believe it, dear, but I’ve discovered an entirely new position for lovemaking.”
“Really,” said Mrs. Robinson, interested at once. “What is it?”
“Back to back.”
“But that’s crazy. We can’t do anything back to back.”
“Yes we can. I’ve persuaded another couple to help out.”