Joke #1544

If a fifty cent piece and a quarter were on the Empire State Building, which would jump off first? The quarter, because it has less sense (cents).
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has 20.26 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: money

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Q: How was copper wire invented? A: Two jews fighting over a penny.
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There is the story of a preacher who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets."
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has 44.92 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: money
Think nobody knows you’re alive? Try missing a payment.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money
After Graduating from High School, David moves away from home to study at University. One of his letters home reads: Dear Father, University i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply ¢an't think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you. Love, Your $on. After receiving his son's letter, the father immediately replies by sending a letter back. Dear David, I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh. Love, Dad
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has 75.88 % from 166 votes. More jokes about: dad, graduation, money, school, student
Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first 10 words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, money, technology, work
Two boys were talking and the one said to the other, "There is a easy way to get what you want." The other boy said, "How?" the boy replied, "Tell people you know their secret." The boy jumps up and runs to his dad, "I know your secret!" The dad replies, "Please don't tell your mom heres $10." The boy then runs to his mom, "I know your secret!" The mom said, "Please don't tell your dad here's $15." The boy then decides to try it on the mail man, "I know your secret!" The mail man opened his arms and said, "Come, give your dad a hug!"
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has 84.84 % from 238 votes. More jokes about: dad, life, money
Peter sat at his dying wife's bedside. Her voice was little more than a whisper. "Pete, darling," she breathed, "I've a confession to make before I go. ... I ... I'm the one who took the $10,000 from your safe. I spent it on a fling with your best friend, Alex. And it was I who forced your mistress to leave the city. And I am the one who reported your income-tax evasion to the government. . . ." "That's all right, sweetie, don't give it a second thought," answered Peter, "I'm the one who poisoned you."
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has 53.70 % from 193 votes. More jokes about: death, marriage, money, wife
Q: Why did the silly kid try to feed pennies to the cat? A: Because his mother told him to put money in the kitty.
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has 47.24 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: cat, kids, kitty, money
I hate paying my income tax. You should be a good citizen - why don't you pay with a smile? I'd like to but they insist on money.
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has 34.72 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: money, tax
Two Jewish guys are walking when one notices a sign on a Catholic church that says "Convert to Christianity, and we'll give you $100." The one says to the other, "should we do it?" The other says "NO!! Are you crazy?" The first guy replies "Hey, a hundred dollars is a hundred dollars... I'm gonna do it." So he walks in to the church, and little while later, he walks back out. The friend says "well, did you get the money?" He replies "Oh that's all you people think about, isn't it?"
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has 78.59 % from 848 votes. More jokes about: catholic, church, jewish, money, racist