Joke #156

Q: What did the pedophile say when he was released from prison? A: "I feel like a kid again."
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has 48.63 % from 127 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, kids, prison

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A little nine year old girl was in church with her mother when she started feeling ill. "Mommy" she said "Can we leave now?" "No" her mother replied. "Well, I think I have to throw up!" "Then go out the front door and around to the back of the church and throw up behind a bush." In about two minutes the little girl returned to her seat. "Did you throw up?" her mother asked. "Yes" the little girl replied. "Well, how could you have gone all the way to the back of the church and return so quickly?" "I didn't have to go out of the church, Mommy" the little girl replied, "They have a box next to the front door that says 'for the sick'."
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has 66.49 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: catholic, church, disgusting, kids
Little Johnny: "I've piss may I go out?" Teacher : "Piss is an impolite word instead you say I've number 1." Jimmy: "May I go out? I want to shit." Teacher: "Shit is also a bad word it is better to use number 2 instead." Ronald: "There is a wind in my belly give me please a number for it."
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has 66.10 % from 126 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, kids, teacher, vulgar
Mom! I'm a 3D printer! Oh come on, Tommy, close the door when you poop.
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has 59.89 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, kids, technology
One day God came to Adam to pass on some news. "I've got some good news and some bad news," God said. Adam looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first." Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things and have intelligent conversations with Eve. The other organ I have for you is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your life form and populate this planet. Eve will be very happy that you now have this organ to give her children." Adam, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?" God looked upon Adam and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time." Then, God came to Eve to pass on some news too. "I've got some good news and some bad news," God said. Eve looked at God and said, "Well, give me the good news first." Smiling, God explained, "I've got two new organs for you. One is called a brain. It will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things and have intelligent conversations with Adam. The other organ I have for you is called a vagina. It will allow you to reproduce your now intelligent life form and populate this planet. Adam will be very happy that you now have this organ to give him children." Eve, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great gifts you have given to me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?" God looked upon Eve and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is that when I created you, I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time. While you're bleeding through one of them every 28 days, the other will remain useless."
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has 47.97 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, god, kids
What is the difference between a fridge and a kid? A fridge doesn't shout when you put your meat inside it.
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has 33.78 % from 88 votes. More jokes about: black humor, disgusting, kids
I hope the children will never find out why I say "oops..." so often when I vacuum their rooms.
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has 31.72 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, kids, masturbation
Q: What did the pedophile say when he was released from prison? A: "I feel like a kid again."
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has 27.60 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: age, disgusting, prison
The cop got out of his car and the kid, who was stopped for speeding, rolled down his window. “I’ve been waiting for you all day,” the cop said. The kid replied, “Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.” When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
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has 41.89 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: cop, kids
Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
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has 34.04 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, fart, women
Yesterday I accidentally hit a little kid with my car. It wasn't serious — nobody saw me.
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has 68.12 % from 92 votes. More jokes about: black humor, car, kids