Joke #1775

Q: What gets wetter the more it dries? A: A towel.
Vote: has 27.24 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Two statues, male and female, faced each other in the city park for many years. An angel appeared before the statues and said, "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire." The statues came to life and smiled at each other. They ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling and twigs snapping. After 15 minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling. Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, "You still have 15 minutes. Would you like to continue?" The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?" Giggling, the female statue said, "Sure, but this time, you hold the pigeon down and I'll crap on its head!"
Vote: has 77.20 % from 47 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, couple, disgusting, life, time
Chuck Norris can press "Pause" on reality.
Vote: has 74.43 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, game, life
Are you free on Sunday? The director asks his secretary. Yes, sir. Then, please, use this day to rest a bit, so you won’t be late at work on Monday.
Vote: has 43.73 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
If kim kardashian was a donut wat kind would she be? Chocolate filled.
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, chocolate, food, life
If you majored in fine arts or philosophy, you have good reason to be worried. The only place you are now really qualified to get a job is in Ancient Greece.
Vote: has 71.43 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: graduation, life, school, work
How long does it take a Mexican to build a, holy shit they're done!
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
A zebra has wondered his whole life whether he was a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes. When he dies and goes to heaven he asks God the question "Am I a white zebra with black stripes or a black zebra with white stripes?" God responds, "You are what you are" The zebra goes to his friends and tells them what God had said and that he still doesn't know the answer to his question. One of his friends says, "Well, that means you are a white zebra with black stripes" The zebra asks him why and the friend says, "Because otherwise God would have said 'You is what you is'"
Vote: has 66.77 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, god, life, racist
Q: What does an Irishman get after eating Italian food? A: Gaelic breath.
Vote: has 72.24 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, life
Today my stoner friend used my to-do list as a blunt wrap. He was high on my list of priorities.
Vote: has 73.89 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: friendship, life
Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see that Indian?" "Yeah," says the other cowboy.  "Look," says the first one, "he's listening to the ground. He can hear things for miles in any direction."  Just then the Indian looks up. "Covered wagon," he says, "about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white. Man, woman, child, household effects in wagon." "Incredible!" says the cowboy to his friend. "This Indian knows how far away they are, how many horses, what colour they are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. Amazing!"  The Indian looks up and says, "Ran over me about a half hour ago."
Vote: has 78.55 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, cowboy, life, men, women