Q: What did Bacon say to Tomato?
A: Lettuce get together! 
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Chuck Norris dropped the apple on Isaac Newtons Head.
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A patient: "Doctor, I don’t feel hungry after taking meal."
Doctor: "Really, your condition is very serious. Wait a bit."
(After sometime, the doctor holds out some medicines).
Doctor: "Take these pills. You take one pill after your sleep and another one before you get-up."
Roses are red,
violets are blue,
sugar is sweet,
but nothing compared to you.
Customer to Waiter: "This is the third time I'm asking you, do you serve pigs in here?!"
Waiter: "Sir Please sit down, this is the 100th time I telling you, we serve everyone here."
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Joke has 79.46 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, food, mean, vulgar
"Waiter, what is this hare doing in my salad?"
"I believe he's eating your lettuce."
Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey on Thanksgiving?
They couldn't get the moose in the oven!
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Yo mama is so stupid when you asked her to grab McDonald's she brings the building home.
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If Chuck Norris were an Adam's Apple, he'd be in your throat right now.
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Why does a chicken lay eggs?
Because if she dropped them, they’d break.
Cletus Cletus goes to work and sees that one of his co-workers has a thermos.
He asks him what it does and the fellow co-worker responds, "It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold."
Cletus was amazed and when he got home immediately went out and bought one.
The next day he goes to work and is proud that he has this wonderful object.
The same co-worker realizes he has a thermos and says, "What do you have in it?"
He says, "Soup and ice cream!"