Joke #1817

Question: What do you call a woman with two brain cells? Answer: Pregnant.
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has 54.06 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: women

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Q: What element is a girl's future best friend? A: Carbon.
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has 55.57 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, friendship, nerd, women
A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?" "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. "How do you know that?" "Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the Priest said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer"
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has 48.78 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: marriage, priest, wedding, women
How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
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has 31.97 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: women
Q: How are women and tornadoes alike? A: They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they go.
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has 77.51 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: mean, weather, women
Q: What's the difference between a whore and a bitch? A: A whore fucks everybody and a bitch fucks everybody but you.
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has 73.64 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, vulgar, women
A man in his mid forties bought a new BMW and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to see what the engine had. As the needle jumped up to 80 mph, he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him. “There’s no way they can catch a BMW,” he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 90, then 100, and finally reality hit him and he knew he shouldn’t run from the police, so he slowed down and pulled over. The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car. “It’s been a long day, this is the end of my shift and it’s Friday the 13th. I don’t feel like more paperwork, so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven’t heard before, you can go.” The guy thinks for a second and says, “Last week my wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid you were trying to give her back.” “Have a nice weekend,” said the officer and he walked away.
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has 85.23 % from 634 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, wife, women
Q: Why can women play hockey? A: Because they have to change their pads after every period.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sport, time, women
Lady goes to her doc. "Doc, I have quite the problem. I can't control my gas. All day long I'm farting and farting. The only good news is they are the 'silent but deadly' type. The Doc pauses for a moment and replies, "first let's get you fitted for a hearing aid."
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has 51.34 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: women
Lifting weights have really helped me with the ladies - the last five I raped didn't stand a chance.
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has 42.21 % from 108 votes. More jokes about: black humor, sex, women
Trafic policeman: "Didn't you hear my whistle, madam?" Woman driver: "Yes, but I don't like flirting while I'm driving."
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has 75.90 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, flirt, women