Joke #207

Confucius say, man who fart in church sit in own pew.
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Q: Why do men fart louder than women? A: because they have a microphone and two speakers.
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Question: Why do men fart more than women? Answer: Because women won’t shut up long enough to build up pressure.
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Q: Why do men like blonde jokes? A: Because they can understand them.
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If you have a grief nobody feels, If you have a pain nobody feels. If your heart is broken nobody feels, but if you fart all will understand.
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Q. Why don't little girls fart? A. Because they don't get assholes until they're married.
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Lets face it, there are a lot of dumb people out there. Sometimes you want to express how stupid they really are and here's how... An intellect rivaled only by garden tools. As smart as bait. Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash. Doesn't know much, but leads the league in nostril hair. Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor. Forgot to pay his brain bill. His belt doesn't go through all the loops. If he had another brain, it would be lonely. Missing a few buttons on his remote control. Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse. Receiver is off the hook. Surfing in Nebraska. An experiment in Artificial Stupidity. A few beers short of a six-pack. A few peas short of a casserole. The cheese slid off his cracker. Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear. Couldn't pour piss out of a boot with instructions on the heel. He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
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In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman.
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Q: How do you know a gay guy has farted? A: He needs to change his pants afterward.
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Q: What do you call someone who doesn't fart in public? A: A private tooter.
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regular ass (_!_) fat ass (__!__) tight ass (!) flat ass (_._) bubble ass (_^_) sore ass (_*_) lop-sided ass (_!__) swishy ass {_!_} surprised ass (_o_) ass that's been around (_O_) kiss my ass (_x_) leave my ass alone (_X_) tired ass (_zzz_) wise ass (_o^o_) unlucky ass (_13_) money out the ass (_$_) dumb ass (_?_)
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