Joke #2343

Q. What's the difference between tampons and cowboy hats? A. Cowboy hats are for ass holes.

A man came up with a new invention, a vibrating tampon. That way a woman can be at her best when she is at her worst.

I was married to a Gemini she caught me cheating on her with herself.

Yo momma so fat when I crawl in her pussy I can't find my way out.

A man comes home and tells his wife to tell him something that is going to laugh and cry. Wife thinks for a minute and says... "of all your friends you have the biggest dick."

Man to vicar: ‘Do you approve of sex before marriage?’ Vicar: ‘Not if it delays the service.’

A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling. "Which one of you sidewinders stole my horse?!" he yelled with surprising forcefulness. No one answered. "Alright, I'm gonna have another beer, and if my horse ain't back outside by the time I finish, I'm gonna do what I dun in Texas! And I don't like to have to do what I dun in Texas!" Some of the locals shifted restlessly. The man, true to his word, had another beer, walked outside, and his horse has been returned to the post. He saddled up and started to ride out of town. The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, "Say partner, before you go... what happened in Texas?" The cowboy turned back and said, "I had to walk home."

Little cowboy runs into a Bar shouting angerly "WHO's the lousy varmint that painted my horse green?" A big cowboy sidles up to him and says "I DID.. want to complain to me?" "No," says the little guy "just wanted you to know that the first coat is dry!"

A cowboy and a retard are sitting at home bored. The cowboy says," let's go down to the bowling alley and beat up niggers." The retard says ," OK ". When they arrive , the cowboy sees five black dudes bowling. He goes over and starts beating their asses. He stops and looks to see the retard smashing bowling balls with a sledgehammer. He goes over and says, " hey... I thought we was gonna beat up niggers?" The retard responds, " yeah...you get the live ones, I'll kill the eggs ."

Q: Ever had sex while camping? A: It's fucking intents.

Last year Chuck Norris won the prize for best float at the Carnival in Rio simply by walking in the parade wearing his cowboy hat.