Q. What do you say to a virgin when she sneezes?
A. Goes-in-tight!
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In funeral of my friend's wife, I went to condole him so I said: "Don't think she was your wife, she was for all".
What's worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning?
Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.
Q: What do gay guys have in common with bungee jumpers?
A: If the rubber breaks, they're in deep shit!
A couple have just had sex.
The woman says, ‘If I got pregnant, what would we call the baby?’
The man takes off his condom, ties a knot in it, and flushes it down the toilet.
‘Well,’ he says.
‘If he can get out of that, we’ll call him Houdini.’
Remember my name, because you'll be screaming it later!
What is 6.9?
A great thing ruined by a period.
A woman gives birth to a baby, and afterwards, the doctor comes in and he says, "I have to tell you something about your baby."
The woman sits up in bed and says, "What's wrong with my baby doctor? What's wrong?"
The doctor says, "Well, now, nothing's wrong, exactly, but your baby is a little bit different. Your baby is a hermaphrodite."
The woman is confused. "A hermaphrodite..... what's that?"
The doctor replies, "Well, it means your baby has the.......er......features....of a male and a female."
The woman turns pale. She says, "Oh MY GOD! you mean it has a penis..... AND a brain.
Yo mama is so stupid, she did her dad last night.
Q: How do you find a blind man at a nude beach?
A: It’s not hard.