A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them." A friend says, "O.K., "What's the capital of Wisconsin?" The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy, W."
Q: What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is on? A: It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off.
Why did the blonde stand in front of the mirror with her eyes closed? She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.
Blonde: "I'm on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me." Psychiatrist: "Don't you have a cell phone?" Blonde: "They're too expensive, so I did the next best thing: I put a mailbox in my car." Psychiatrist: "And do you receive any letters?" Blonde: "No, but I figure it's because when I'm driving around, my zip code keeps changing."
A guy is driving his car and finds a friend crying, sitting on the road. He stops. And he asks him: - Hey, What happens to you? - (crying) Look! and he points a crashed car. - Well, don't care and buy another car. - Look inside the car! - Well, don't care and get another blonde, and that's all. - Look inside her mouth!!!
A blonde pick ups her dress from the dry cleaners, when she leaves the Cashier says, "Come again!" Bonde said, "Nah..It was ketchup this time."
Q: What is a blondes' reaction to hearing "drinks are on the house". A: Where's the stairs.
Q: How did the blonde kill her toy poodle? A: Trying to put batteries in it.
Three women were sitting in a bar, (a brunette, red head, and a blonde) they were all pregnant. The brunette says, "I know what I'm going to have." The other to asked how. She replied, "well I was on top when I conceived so I will have a boy". The red head said, "If that is true then I will have a girl because I was on the bottom when I conceived. The blonde starts crying and orders another shot and starts screaming, "PUPPIES, PUPPIES!".
Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? To see what was on the other side.
How many blonde does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 3. One to hold the lightbulb and two to turn the ladder.