The old mosquito puts the little baby’s to bed and tells them:
If you are good, tomorrow I’m going to take you to the nudists.
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Chuck Norris Killed Medusa with a round house Kick.
Vote:
Why do lions always eat raw meat?
"Because they don't know how to cook."
Two flies sit on a pile of poop.
One fly passes gas.
The other fly looks at him and says, "Hey do you mind? I'm eating here."
Vote:
Why was the young kangaroo thrown out by his mother?
For smoking in bed.
"Pa's being chased by a bull!"
"Well, what in tarnation do you want me to do about it?"
"Get me some film for my camera."
The judge:
Why did you shoot the rabbit without being a member of the hunters association?
The inculpated:
Why did the rabbit eat cabbage from my garden, without being a family member?
Crocodiles are easy.
They try to kill and eat you.
People are harder.
Sometimes they pretend to be your friend first.
- Steve Irwin (1962 - 2006)
Vote:
A guy rings his boss and says "I can't come to work today"
The boss asks why and the guy says "it's my eyes."
"What's wrong with your eyes?" asks the boss.
"I just can't see myself coming to work, so I'm going fishing instead..."