Joke #2736

What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A battery has a positive side.
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has 41.91 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: women

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A man went to England on a trip and met a woman there, they grew to like each other enough for her to come to America with the man on his flight home. When they got back to America the man said, “I would like to show you an American pastime: baseball.” So the next day the man took her to a baseball game. The first man came up to the plate and hit the ball to right field and got to first base, the next man bunted the ball and got to first base, and the third man came up to the plate and got walked. The man said, “Are you understanding this game?” The woman answered, “Yes, but what I don't understand is why the thrower hurls the ball at the first man and he hits it. Then he hurls the ball at the second man and he taps it and runs to where the other man was standing. And then the third man, this is the part I don't understand, the thrower hurls the ball and he just stand there, and he hurls the ball at him again and he just stands there, and he hurls the ball at him again and he just stands there, and he hurls the ball at him again and he just stands there then he just walks to the place where the other man was standing.” Then the man says, “Well that is because he has four balls.” The woman says, “Poor thing! He couldn't run if he tried.”
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has 43.73 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: sport, women
Q: What is the difference between a pizza and a women? A: The pizza can be eaten but the women can't!
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has 36.90 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: food, women
Women are Angels. And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly... On a broomstick. We're flexible like that.
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has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: women
How is a police car like a women? It flashes and It usually has a d*ck in it.
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: cop, women
How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
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has 31.97 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: women
A woman and baby are in the doctors surgery, the doc is concerned about the babys weight, "Is he bottle fed or breast fed? The woman replies, "Breast fed." The doc gets her to strip down to her waist so he can examine her breasts. He pinches her nipples and sucks and rubs both breasts for a while ... "No wonder the baby is underweight, you have no milk." Woman replies, "I know, Im his granny ... but Im glad I came!"
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has 79.70 % from 125 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, women
Woman to her husband while at it: "Please say dirty things to me!" Man: "Bath, Kitchen, Living room..."
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has 68.56 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, mean, men, women
How many women does it take to change a light bulb? 11, 10 to form a committee and 1 to get her boyfriend to do it..
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has 29.93 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: women
What do you do if your dishwasher breaks down? Kick her where the sun don't shine.
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has 34.09 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: women
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season" Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven." The Englishman fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. "It's a candle", he said. "You may pass through the pearly gates" Saint Peter said. The Scotsman reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells." Saint Peter said "You may pass through the pearly gates." The Irishman started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties. St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?" The Irishman replied, "These are Carol's"
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has 83.87 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: death, heaven, life, women