Joke #2765

A French monk wrote a manifesto stating that every woman would agree to sell her body for money. The manifesto was read by the Queen of France and she invited the monk for a chat. So, you're stating that every women would agree to sell herself? Yes. Me too? Of course. And how much do you think I would cost? 500 francs. What?! Only 500 francs?! Here you go - you've already started to negotiate.
Vote: has 69.58 % from 203 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Two old ladies were outside smoking one day when it started to rain. One of the ladies took out a condom, cut off the tip, and put it over her cigarette. The other lady said, 'Hey, that's a good idea. What's that called?' The lady responded, 'It's a condom.' The other lady said, 'Where can you get one of those?' She said, 'Oh, just about any grocery of drug store.' So, the next day, the lady went to a local drug store, went up to the cashier, and said, 'I need to get some condoms.' The cashier looked at her puzzled (because of her age) and said, 'UH, what size?' The lady responded, 'Hmm, one that would fit a camel.'
Vote: has 72.19 % from 340 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, drug, sex
A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!"
Vote: has 64.50 % from 185 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, men, sex, time, women
A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, "Mypenis," and the wife falls on the ground laughing because on the screen it says, "Error. Not long enough."
Vote: has 81.85 % from 5616 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Q: How big are the pastro's beds? A: Oh c'mon, it knows every little kid.
Vote: has 44.92 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, kids, religious, sex
What do you call kinky sex with chocolate? S&M&M.
Vote: has 47.79 % from 45 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Q. What's the difference between tampons and cowboy hats? A. Cowboy hats are for ass holes.
Vote: has 46.16 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: cowboy, sex
Q: Why do women have two holes so close together? A: In case you miss.
Vote: has 63.92 % from 90 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex, women
One day a women walks into work in a short skirt. As she’s walking to her desk she gets stopped by a co-worker, who says, “Your hair smells really nice today.” She grimaces and stomps into her manager’s office. She says,”I want to file a sexual harassment complaint!” and then relates what happened. The manager says, “What’s wrong with him complimenting how your hair smells?” Furious, she snarls, “He’s a midget!”
Vote: has 69.79 % from 86 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, sex, women, work
A man and woman were celebrating their 50 year anniversary. That night, the woman comes out of the bathroom completely naked and looks at her husband who is already in bed. She says, "Honey, 50 years ago tonight, when I came out of the bathroom with no clothes on, what were you thinking?" He said, "I was thinking that I wanted to suck your titties dry and fuck you until you couldn’t think straight." She smiled at him and said, "So what are you thinking now?" He said, "I think I did a pretty good job!"
Vote: has 57.55 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: anniversary, husband, marriage, sex, time
When Viagra first came out my wife and I decided to give it a go to see what all the fuss was about. I popped the pill and waited the 15 minutes and then it was on for young and old. We timed the performance to the minute and it all finally subsided at 3 hours and 17 minutes. I asked the missus what she thought and she simply stated that she couldn't understand what all the hype was about for an extra 17 minutes...
Vote: has 56.92 % from 37 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, sex, time, viagra, wife