Joke #2788

Teacher: “Why are you late?” Boy: “Because of a sign down the road.” Teacher: “What does a sign have to do with your being late?” Boy: “The sign said, ‘School Ahead, Go Slow!’”
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has 37.02 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: school

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A little girl came home from school and said to her mother, “Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn’t do. “The mother exclaimed, “But that’s terrible! I’m going to have a talk with your teacher about this … by the way, what was it that you didn’t do?” The little girl replied, “My homework.”
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has 33.31 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: school, teacher
Mother: Come on Pete you have to get out of bed or you'll be late for the college. Peter: O mum do I have to, all the teachers hate me, and all the students hate me too. Mother: Yes you do. Peter: Give me a good reason Mother: You're 52 and you are the Principal!
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has 57.40 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: age, college, school
Yo mama so fat when she was in school she sat by everybody!
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: fat, insulting, school, Yo mama
A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. Timmy stood up and said, "My mom is a doctor!" Sarah stood up and said, "My father is a professor!" Little Johnny stood up and said, "My dad is a piano player in a whorehouse!" The teacher couldn't believe what she's had just heard, so she made a point of calling Little Johnny's father that evening to discuss the situation. Little Johnny's father explained, "Actually, I'm a law attorney, but how am I supposed to explain that to a seven year old kid!"
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has 61.59 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: doctor, lawyer, school, student, teacher
Teacher: What's 2 and 2? Pupil: 4 Teacher: That's good. Pupil: Good? That's perfect!
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has 58.55 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: kids, math, school, student, teacher
Mom: What did you do at school today? Mark: We did a guessing game. Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam. Mark: That’s right!
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has 83.02 % from 331 votes. More jokes about: school
The teacher brings a statue of Venus into class and asks, “What do you like best about it, class? Let’s start with you, Robert.” Robert: “The artwork.” Teacher: “Very good. And you, Peter?” Peter: “Her tits!” Teacher: “Peter, get out! Go stand in the hall! And you, Johnny?” Johnny: “I’m leaving, teacher, I’m leaving…”
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has 70.74 % from 89 votes. More jokes about: school
The answer to the problem was “log(1+x)”. A student copied the answer from the student next to him, but didn’t want to make it obvious that he was cheating, so he changed the answer slightly, to “timber(1+x).”
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has 68.81 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: school
After Sunday school, the teacher released the kids to go to church and reminded them, "You all know to be very nice and quiet in the church. And why is that?"  Little Johnny offers, "Miss, it's so we wouldn't wake all those people sleeping."
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has 72.29 % from 115 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, school, teacher
Little Johnny comes home and tells his daddy, "Dad, tomorrow there's a special 'Adults' evening' at school. Daddy is surprised, "Really? Special?" "Yes," nods Johnny, "it will be just you, the teacher, the headmaster and two police officers."
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has 71.34 % from 95 votes. More jokes about: cop, dad, little Johnny, school