Joke #3130

The Judge said to the defendant. "I thought I told you I never wanted to see you in here again." "Your Honor," the criminal said, "that's what I tried to tell the police, but they wouldn't listen."

An elementary school class goes on a field trip to the police station. The Officer points to the 10 MOST WANTED list and tells them that these are the most wanted fugitives in the USA. Little Boy says " He is the MOST WANTED in the USA?!" Officer says "Yes." Little Boy asks "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture.

You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.

Why did the policeman carry a pencil and a piece of very thin paper? He wanted to trace someone.

A priest was driving down the road one day when getting stopped by a cop. The cop smelled alcohol on the priest's breath and saw an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He said to the priest, "Father, have you been drinking?" The priest replied, "Only water, officer." The cop then asked him, "Then why can I smell wine?" The priest looked at the bottle and said, "Good Lord! He's done it again."

A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walk s to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas.

When President Roosevelt dropped the atomic bomb on Hiroshima, he did so only because it was more human then sending Chuck Norris.

A black guy and his black girlfriend are in a car. Who's driving? "The cop!"

When customs finds something in your butt, how do you act surprised?

A couple young, entrepreneurial prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on the top of their car that read: "Two Prostitutes – $50.00." A police officer, seeing the sign, pulled the ladies over and advised that they will have to remove the sign or go to jail. Right about that time a minivan passed by with a sign on the side of it that read: "Jesus Saves." "How come you don’t stop them?" asked one of the girls. "Well, that’s a little different," the officer replied… "their sign pertains to religion." The two ladies of the night pouted a bit, but they took their sign down and drove off peacefully. The following day the same police officer was running radar when he noticed the same two young ladies driving around with another sign on their car. Figuring he had an easy arrest, he flipped his lights on and began to catch up when he noticed the what the new sign read: "Two Fallen Angels Seeking Peter – $50.00."

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black.