Joke #3183

Why is money called dough? Because we all knead it!
Vote: has 27.24 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can. The bartender says, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?" The guy says, "You would be drinking fast if you had what I had." The bartender says, "What do you have?" The guy says, "75 cents."
Vote: has 28.61 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, money
Yo mama is so fat when she sat on WALMART she lowered the price.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, insulting, money, Yo mama
Yo' Mama is like my cell phone plan: 10 cents a minute anytime, anywhere, no restrictions.
Vote: has 67.69 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money, phone, Yo mama
How much money did the bronco have? Only a buck!
Vote: has 60.15 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, money
Our body cells renew while asleep. If only our wallets could do the same.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money
Einstein dies and goes to heaven only to be informed that his room is not yet ready. "I hope you will not mind waiting in a dormitory. We are very sorry, but it's the best we can do and you will have to share the room with others" he is told by the doorman. Einstein says that this is no problem at all and that there is no need to make such a great fuss. So the doorman leads him to the dorm. They enter and Albert is introduced to all of the present inhabitants. "See, Here is your first room mate. He has an IQ of 180!" "That's wonderful!" says Albert. "We can discuss mathematics!" "And here is your second room mate. His IQ is 150!" "That's wonderful!" says Albert. "We can discuss physics!" "And here is your third room mate. His IQ is 100!" "That's wonderful! We can discuss the latest plays at the theater!" Just then another man moves out to capture Albert's hand and shake it. "I'm your last room mate and I'm sorry, but my IQ is only 80." Albert smiles back at him and says, "So, where do you think interest rates are headed?"
Vote: has 26.98 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money
The lawyer’s motto: a man is not guilty until he demonstrates he is out of money...
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: lawyer, money
A man stumbles across an old lamp while he was at his attorney's office. Figuring his luck has to change, he rubs the lamp and out pops a genie. The genie explains to him that he gets three wishes, and whatever he wishes for, his wife gets double. The man asks for his first wish. "The first thing I want is a million dollars." The genie says, "Okay, but you know that your wife gets two million." The man said, "That's okay. My second wish is for a large house on a remote tropical paradise." The genie says, "Then your wife will have two beautiful houses." The man replied, "That's fine. Now for my third wish. I want you to beat me half to death."
Vote: has 83.29 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, genie, mean, money, wife
Q: Would you burn your education certificate for 50 million us dollars? Me: I will burn my certificate, I will burn the school, the nearby schools and even the ministry of education I will also burn all the textbooks.
Vote: has 67.68 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money, school, student
One reason the Services have trouble operating jointly is that they don’t speak the same language. For example, if you told Navy personnel to “secure a building,” they would turn off the lights and lock the doors. Army personnel would occupy the building so no one could enter. Marines would assault the building, capture it, and defend it with suppressive fire and close combat. The Air Force, on the other hand, would take out a three-year lease with an option to buy.
Vote: has 62.19 % from 46 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: air force, death, military, money, navy