Joke #3515

A man rushes out of his wife's hospital room. "Doctor, doctor -- my wife's been in a coma for several months, but when I just touched her left breast, she sighed!" "That's very encouraging," says the doctor. "Go back and touch her right breast. See if she reacts." A few minutes later, the man rushes out again: "Doctor, she moaned!" "Very good," says the doctor. "Now try oral sex. She should certainly react to that!" Five minutes later, the man comes out back out, white as a sheet. "Doctor -- she died." "No! What happened?" the doctor exclaims. "Well, doc," the man says tearfully, "she choked."
Vote: has 43.21 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

What's the best way to force a man to do sit-ups? Put the remote control between his toes.
Vote: has 34.87 % from 8 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
Q:How many divorced men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A:None, the sockets go with the house.
Vote: has 51.34 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: divorce, light bulb, men
Two guys die in a car accident and an angel descends from heaven. "I am to give you your wings so you can fly to heaven. But if you think one dirty thought or act out one dirty act your wings will fall off." So they fly to heaven without any trouble but when they get there the first guy sees a naked woman walk by so his wings falll off. When he bends over to pick them up the second guy's wings fall off.
Vote: has 76.80 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?" "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. "How do you know that?" "Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the Bishop said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer"
Vote: has 51.42 % from 179 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage, math, men, wedding, women
How are men like noodles? They're always in hot water, they lack taste, and they need dough.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
A priest and a shepherd from Australia participate in a TV game. After answering all the questions, there is a tie. So both are given one final assignment. It is to write a poem in three minutes, using the word "Timbuktu". It is city in Africa. The priest returns with the fruit of his inspiration: "I was a father all my life, I had no children, had no wife, I read the bible through and through on my way to Timbuktu ... " The poem makes a great impression, and the priest smells a sweet victory. But then comes the shepherd, with his winning masterpiece: "When Tim and I to Brisbane went We met three women cheap to rent. They were three and we were two, So I booked one and Tim Booked Two ... "
Vote: has 81.42 % from 118 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
Q: What would it be a good idea for you to do after a man takes your wife? A: Let him keep her!
Vote: has 71.85 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: mean, men, wife
Single women claim that all the good men are married, while all married women complain about their lousy husbands. This confirms that there is no such thing as a good man. This confirms too, that women are always confused and don't know what they want.
Vote: has 67.68 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage, men, single, women
Do you know why men have holes in the end of their penises? So oxygen can get into their brains.
Vote: has 74.84 % from 8 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
Q: What do you call a man who has lost 98% of his brain? A: A widower.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men