Joke #3575

A little girl and boy are fighting about the differences between the sexes, and which one is better. Finally, the boy drops his pants and says, “Here’s something I have that you’ll never have!” The little girl is pretty upset by this, since it is clearly true, and runs home crying. A while later, she comes running back with a smile on her face. She drops her pants and says, “My mommy says that with one of these, I can have as many of those as I want!”
Vote: has 80.38 % from 2580 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

I tried some of that aphrodisiac rhino horn. Now I’ve got an overwhelming desire to charge at Land Rovers.
Vote: has 34.20 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
An older couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time. Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married. Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements, and so on. Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship. "How do you feel about s*x?" he asked, rather tentatively. "I would like it infrequently ", she replied. The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, adjusted his glasses, then leaned over towards her and whispered, "Is that one word or two?"
Vote: has 86.05 % from 1263 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: couple, marriage, old people, sex
A young newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor told them, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks." The couple agreed and came back at the end of two weeks. The pastor asked them, "Well, were you able to get through the two weeks without being intimate?" "Pastor, I'm afraid we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks," the young man replied. "What happened?" inquired the pastor. "My wife was reaching for a can of corn on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was over come with lust and took advantage of her right there." "You understand, of course, that this means you will not be welcome in our church," stated the pastor. "That's okay," said the young man. "We're not welcome at the grocery store anymore either."
Vote: has 86.64 % from 2030 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
A group of girlfriends is on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: "For Women Only." Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in. The Bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. "We have 5 floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide since each floor has a sign telling you what's inside." The women start going up and on the first floor the sign reads: "All the men here have it short and thin." The friends laugh and without hesitation move on to the next floor. The sign on the second floor reads: "All the men here have it long and thin." Still, this isn't good enough so the friends continue on up. They reach the third floor and the sign reads: "All the men here have it short and thick." They still want to do better, and so, knowing there are still two floors left, they continued on up. On the fourth floor, the sign is perfect: "All the men here have it long and thick." The women get all excited and are going in when they realize that there is still one floor left. Wondering what they are missing, they head on up to the fifth floor. There they find a sign that reads: "There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that there is no way to please a woman."
Vote: has 77.70 % from 373 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: husband, men, sex, women
Q: What's the difference between basketball and sex? A: In basketball you dribble before you shoot!
Vote: has 64.23 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, sex, sport
Q: How do you know a gay guy has farted? A: He needs to change his pants afterward.
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, fart, gay, sex
Three women were debating about how wide their pussy are. The first one said: "When my husband makes sex he puts his penis and his testicles in my pussy." The second lady said: "Wooo when we are in bed my husband puts his hand and his arm in mine." It was the turn of the third woman that pointed to her pussy and said: Jimy; Jimy come out, please."
Vote: has 83.41 % from 210 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex, women
Q: Why are Christmas trees better than Men? A: Even the small ones give satisfaction.
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, men, sex
Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom. Because he never f*cks up.
Vote: has 62.79 % from 50 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sex
Q. What's a blonde's idea of safe sex? A. Locking the car door.
Vote: has 53.58 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, car, sex