Joke #3717

What's black and white, black and white, and black and white? (A panda bear rolling down a hill!)
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Once upon time, there were three friends playing on a beach. One kid's parents were good business people. The second kid lives in a good family where he is taught to respect his elders. The third kid was a poor redneck with an abusive father. Anyways, they were playing on the beach when a helicopter crashed down into the water. They saw a man drowning and all raced to save him. As they pulled the man to shore they realized it was Obama. The president then said, "Thank you kids for saving me! I'll give you each one wish!" The first kid said he wanted a helicopter. The second kid wished for some money. And the redneck asked for a wheel chair. Obama, concerned, asked why the poor boy wouldn't want some money for his family. The kid replied, "Cause when pap finds out what I've done, I ain't gonna be walking for a pretty long time."
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More jokes about: age, kids, old people, political, racist
In a shop for kids. Peter selects a toy car, comes to the cash desk and gives the cashier money-cards from Monopoly game. The cashier: - Are you stupid? This isn't real money! Peter: - You're stupid. The car is not real either.
Vote: has 78.96 % from 1407 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, kids, money, stupid
One day a boy came home running while crying. His mother asked what happened why are you crying? The boy said`I got punished for something I did not do’. His mother said ‘That’s horrible. what did you not do’. The boy in tears said`my homework’
Vote: has 78.22 % from 712 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, school
Man: "How old is your father?" Boy: "As old as me." Man: "How can that be?" Boy: "He became a father only when I was born."
Vote: has 78.06 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, dad, kids
A couple had been married for 50 years and had raised a brood of 10 children and was blessed with 20 grandchildren. When asked the secret for staying together all that time, the wife replies, "Many years ago we made a promise to each other: the first one to pack up and leave has to take all the kids."
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More jokes about: kids, marriage, time
A little girl took her report card home and showed it to mom. The mother was very disappointed by all the very low grades. "Well look on the bright side" said the child, "you know for sure I don't cheat."
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More jokes about: kids, school, stupid
What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Brothel sprouts.
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A couple placed an ad: "Have 4 sons, need advice on how to get a daughter." Responses: American: "Keep trying!" Briton: "Change Doctor!" Aussie: "Follow a special diet." Indian: "Practice yoga!" Pinoy: "Let me try!"
Vote: has 72.04 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: couple, doctor, food, kids
What do we do with crude oil? Teach it some manners!
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More jokes about: kids
Mum has told her little girl all about the making of babies. Little Annie is now silent for a while. "You understand it now?" Mum asks. "Yes," replies her daughter. "Do you still have any questions?" "Yes, how about little kittens? How does that work?" "In exactly the same way as with babies." "Wow!" the girl exclaims. "My daddy can do ANYTHING!"
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More jokes about: baby, kids, kitty