What's black and white, black and white, and black and white?
(A panda bear rolling down a hill!)
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Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day.
"My name is Billy.
What's yours?" asked the first boy.
"Tommy," replied the second.
"My Daddy's an accountant.
What does your Daddy do for a living?" asked Billy.
Tommy replied, "My Daddy's a lawyer."
"Honest?" asked Billy.
"No, just the regular kind", replied Tommy.
There is three kids sitting at the lunch table one day.
One kid ask what do you call a mixed baby?
One replies a zebra,another replies a mistake and the third one replies.
Rape
*Wakes up to wife and son screaming*
Me: "What are you guys yelling about?"
Them: "You're driving!"
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Teacher: "Who can tell me 5 wild animals?"
Little Johnny: "2 lions & 3 wolves."
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Once upon time, there were three friends playing on a beach.
One kid's parents were good business people.
The second kid lives in a good family where he is taught to respect his elders.
The third kid was a poor redneck with an abusive father.
Anyways, they were playing on the beach when a helicopter crashed down into the water.
They saw a man drowning and all raced to save him.
As they pulled the man to shore they realized it was Obama.
The president then said, "Thank you kids for saving me! I'll give you each one wish!"
The first kid said he wanted a helicopter.
The second kid wished for some money.
And the redneck asked for a wheel chair.
Obama, concerned, asked why the poor boy wouldn't want some money for his family.
The kid replied, "Cause when pap finds out what I've done, I ain't gonna be walking for a pretty long time."
Mary's father has 5 daughters,
1. Nana
2. Nono
3. Nini
4. Nene
What is the fifth daughters name?
If you need to break up with somebody, the best place to do so is McDonalds.
There are no plates or glasses to be broken over your head, no sharp knives or spiky forks, plus you can always hide behind a fat kid.
When teacher entered the class little Jonny slowly said: "Sir excuse me; your zipper is open."
So the teacher thanked him and fastened his zipper.
He went near little Jonny and told him: "My dear it would better to say: the office door is open."
Next day when the teacher entered the class, unfortunately, his zipper was again open!
Little Jonny loudly shouted: "Not only the office door is open but also the teacher is at the door and two small students are beside him."
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My wife and I have reached a decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
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