Joke #3781

How do you know if your wife wears tights in bed? Her toes curl up when you screw her.
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has 42.33 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: sex

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A boy washed with his mum in the bathroom and saw her vagina and asks: "what the hell is this". "It is called a cave" replied the mother. The next day he washed with his father and saw his dick and asks "what the heck is this". "This is called little Johnny". The next day he went to school and his teacher was mad that he came late to school so she told him to sing a song. He started to sing "when the black clouds came out of the mountain little Johnny ran into the cave."
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has 66.10 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, music, school, sex
Did you hear about the transvestite who wanted a night on the town? He wanted to eat, drink and be Mary.
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has 44.84 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q: What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? A: One's a Goodyear. The other's a great year.
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has 71.25 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, time, vulgar
Q: How does an English man know that his wife has died? A: Sex is still the same but the dishes are stacked in the sink.
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has 57.04 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: death, sex, wife
Why are black peoples eyes red after sex? Pepper spray.
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has 69.72 % from 498 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist, sex
A farm boy who had just finished his schooling on the farm, was sent by his Ma and Pa to the big city to go to college. The first thing the boy does when he gets to town, is go to find a whorehouse. He goes inside to talk to the madam about getting a girl. She leads him upstairs, opens the door to a room and tells him to sit and wait for the girl to arrive. After several minutes of anxious waiting, a young, blonde prostitute comes in. The boy is beside himself, and he leaps up from the bed, grabs the television, and throws it out the window. The girl thinks this is odd behavior, but she shrugs it off, and begins to undress. As she strips, the farmboy runs over, grabs the night stand and throws it out the window. Again the girl thinks this is odd, but being an experienced hooker, she figures it's a fetish and continues disrobing. The girl removes her panties, and with that, the farm boy grabs the entire bed and starts lugging it toward the window. The girl, figuring this is one even she hasn't heard of, finally asks, "What the hell are you doing?" The farm boy replies, "Ah ain't never been with no woman before but, if it's anythin' like fuckin' sheep, we gonna need all the room we can git."
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has 70.89 % from 117 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q: The male sex has two hobbies. What are they? A: His left hand and his right hand.
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: masturbation, men, sex
There are a hundred holes in the body of a woman; one of them would be filled with a penis and 99 others could be filled with money.
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has 65.86 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mean, money, sex, women
A man and woman are lying in bed after a disappointing bout of sex. ‘You’ve got a very small organ,’ says the woman. The man replies, ‘Well I didn’t know I’d be playing in the Albert Hall.’
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has 66.34 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: sex
A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one look at this woman and all his professionalism went out the window. He immediately told her to undress. After she had disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. He asked her, “Do you know what I’m doing?” “Yes,” she replied, “you’re checking for any abrasions or dermatological abnormalities.” “That is right,” said the doctor. He then began to fondle her breasts. “Do you know what I’m doing now?” he asked. “Yes,” the woman said, “you’re checking for any lumps or breast cancer.” “Correct,” replied the shady doctor. Finally, he mounts his patient and started having sexual intercourse with her. He asked, “Do you know what I’m doing now?” “Yes,” she said. “You’re getting herpes; which is why I came here in the first place!”
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has 78.00 % from 162 votes. More jokes about: beauty, dirty, doctor, sex, women