Joke #3815

Q: What is a zebra? A: A horse behind bars.
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has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, horse

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You're riding a horse full speed, there's a giraffe beside you, and you're being chase by a lion. What do you do? Get your drunk ass off the carousel.
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has 74.69 % from 250 votes. More jokes about: animal, drunk, horse
A retiring farmer in preparation for selling his land, needed to rid his farm of animals. So he went to every house in his town. To the houses where the man is the boss, he gave a horse. To the houses where the woman is the boss, a chicken was given. He got toward the end of the street and saw a couple outside gardening. "Who's the boss around here?" he asked. "I am." said the man. "I have a black horse and a brown horse," the farmer said, "which one would you like?" The man thought for a minute and said, "The black one." "No, no, no, get the brown one." the man's wife said. "Here's your chicken." said the farmer.
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has 69.88 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: animal, horse, old people
Q: If a horses foot covers 2 acres of land, what will his tail cover? A: His ass!
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has 69.30 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, horse, vulgar
We must admit that we want to be like some animals. We all want to be strong like a bear, we want to have a sharp sight like a falcon, the intelligence like an owl, the endurance like a horse, we want to sing like a skylark, we want to be running like a fox and of course we all want to have the salivas like a dragon lizard.
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has 53.62 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, horse, life
Did you hear about the Irishman who couldn't tell the difference between his two horses? His friend suggested measuring them, that didn't help though, the Irishman discovered that the brown horse was only an inch taller than the white one!
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has 45.52 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, horse
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
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has 31.40 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, horse
A plowhorse, a honeybee and an old geezer are debating about which of them is the greatest. 
The horse says, "I can plow all day long to provide food for dozens of people!" "
The bee says, "I pollinate all the plants every year and make honey besides!" 
 The old geezer says... (We're waiting...)
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has 26.76 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, horse, old people
A cow and a horse were galloping around a curve opposite to. They landed in each other. Who was wrong? The cow, it didn't blow its horn.
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has 23.58 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, horse
A man walked into his backyard one morning and found there was a gorilla in a tree. He called a gorilla-removal service, and soon a serviceman arrived with a stick, a Chihuahua, a pair of handcuffs and a shotgun. "Now listen carefully," he told the homeowner, "I'm going to climb the tree and poke the gorilla with this stick until he falls to the ground. The trained Chihuahua will then go right for his, uh, sensitive area, and when the gorilla instinctivly crosses his hands in front to protect himself, you slap the handcuffs on" "Ok, got it." the homeowner replied. "But whats that shotgun for?" "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla," the man said, "shoot the Chihuahua."
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has 78.68 % from 236 votes. More jokes about: animal
A horse walks into a bar. He walks up to the bartender and says "Give me a beer." The bartender is stunned, so he heads to the back of the bar to speak with the owner. "Hey boss" he says, "there's a horse in the bar asking for a beer." The bar owner pauses for a second, then replies "Well then give him one, but charge him double. Horses don't know the price of beer." So the bartender heads back out front and hands the horse a beer. "You know," says the barkeep, "we don't get many horses around here." To which the horse replies, "At these prices I'm not surprised."
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has 75.77 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: bar, bartender, beer, horse, money