Joke #3943

What’s the quickest way to double your money? Fold it in half!
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has 44.92 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: money

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An aspiring young lawyer was sitting in her office late one night, when Satan appeared before her. The Devil told the lawyer "I have a proposition for you…" "You can win every case you try for the rest of your life. Your clients will adore you, your colleagues will stand in awe of you, and you will make embarrassing sums of money. All I want in exchange is your your husband’s soul, your children’s souls, the souls of your parents, grandparents, and the souls of all your friends and law partners." The lawyer ponders this for a moment, then finally asks: "So, what’s the catch?"
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has 84.83 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: age, family, husband, lawyer, money
A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads: Cheese Sandwich: $1.50 Chicken Sandwich: $2.50 Hand Job: $10.00 He checks his wallet and beckons to the sexy bartender. "Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?" he asks. "Yes," she purrs. "I am." "Well, wash your frickin' hands," says the man. "I want a cheese sandwich!"
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has 68.89 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: bar, bartender, dirty, food, money
Well goodnight everyone. I have to get up early tomorrow to do nothing and still make more money than all of you!
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has 21.06 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: money, political, republican
Q: Who was the best business woman in the Bible? A: Pharoah's daughter – she drew a profit from the rush at the bank.
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has 50.22 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: bible, business, money, women
Q: How can you tell when the chief accountant is getting soft? A: When he actually listens to marketing before saying no.
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has 75.97 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: accountant, management, money
Why use Linux: No Windows, no Gates, no Bill to pay.
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has 82.79 % from 71 votes. More jokes about: computer, geek, IT, money, technology
How do you hide your money from a mexican?
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has 27.65 % from 142 votes. More jokes about: money, racist
Patient to his doctor: "I have forgotten so many things lately, and it's getting worse. What can I do?" Doctor: "Yes, this is a known illness, unfortunately it has no cure. I'd also like to remind you about the 800 USD that you owe me?"
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has 76.51 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: doctor, money
One day a 12-year-old boy was walking down the street when a car pulled up beside him and the driver lowered a window. "I’ll give you a large bag of M&Ms if you get in the car," said the driver. "No way! Get lost!" replied the boy. "How about a bag of M&Ms and 10 dollars?" the driver asked. "I said no way," replied the boy. "What about a bag of M&Ms and 50 dollars?" asked the driver. "No, I’m not getting in the car," answered the boy. "Okay, I’ll give you a bag of M&Ms and 100 dollars," the driver offered. "No!" replied the boy. "What will it take to get you in the car?" asked the driver. The boy replied: "Listen, Dad: You bought the Volvo-you live with it!"
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has 78.64 % from 102 votes. More jokes about: age, car, dad, kids, money
John: "Hey can I borrow some money? I'm broke." Michael: "Get money from your job." John: "I got fired." Michael: "Why?" John: "My boss told me to leave all my problems behind the door, so I told him to stand outside." Michael: "This is why we are friends."
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has 66.21 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: friendship, life, management, money, work