Did you know you can download the whole Tyson-Holyfield fight off the internet? It doesn’t take much memory – just two Bytes.
A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen". The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them". Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now".
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define "Great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!" He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
Q: What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet? A: Lost.
The 21st century: Deleting history is more important than making it.
Funny facts about Google users: 50% of people use Google well as a search engine. The rest 50% of them use it to check if their internet is connected
A failure in a device will never appear until it has passed final inspection.
How can you tell which one of your friends has the new iPhone 6 plus? Don't worry, they'll let you know.
I put so much more effort into naming my first Wi-Fi than my first child.
90% of programmer errors come from data from other programmers.