Joke #3996

Why is it that when a man talks nasty to a women it’s sexual harassment, but when a women talks nasty to a man it’s £3.99 a minute?
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has 54.16 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: money

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A divorce court judge said to the husband,"Mr Geraghty,I have reviewed this case very carefully and I've decided to give your wife $800 a week." "That's very fair,your honour," he replied. "And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself."
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has 73.93 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: divorce, husband, lawyer, money
Question: What’s six inches long and two inches wide and drives women wild? Answer: Money.
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has 31.72 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: money, women
A man hires a taxi to take him to court for his bankruptcy trial. When they arrive he says to the driver, ‘Well, I suppose you might as well come in too.’
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: money
Money should be utilized as a tool. You just gotta know which nuts to screw.
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has 14.67 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: money
A young man met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the night with her for $500. So they did. Before he left, he told her that he did not have any cash with him, but that he would have his secretary write a check and mail it to her, calling the payment "RENT FOR APARTMENT." On the way to his office he regretted what he had promised, deciding that the whole event was not worth the price. So, he had his secretary send a check for $250 and enclosed the following note: Dear Madam, Enclosed find check in the amount of $250 for rent of your apartment. I am not sending the amount agreed upon because when I rented the apartment I was under the impression that: 1) it had never been occupied 2) that there was plenty of heat 3) that it was small enough to make me cozy and feel at home. Last night, however, I found it had been previously occupied, that there was no heat, and it was entirely too large. Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the check for $250 with the following note: Dear Sir, First of all, I cannot understand how you expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely. As for the heat, there is heat if you know how to turn it on. Regarding the space, the apartment is, indeed, of regular size, but if you don’t have enough furniture to fill it, please don’t blame the landlady!
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has 82.32 % from 131 votes. More jokes about: beauty, men, money, women
When the office printer color started to look a little off the manager called the local repair shop. To the manager's surprise, the clerk said that it would cost $50 but that he might try reading the manual and doing it himself. The manager replied in astonishment, does your boss know that you discourage business that way? "Yes", replied the clerk. It was his idea. We make more on repairs than cleaning printers if the owner tries to do it himself first.
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: management, money, office, technology
Q: You know what lego set Trump played with as a kid? A: The wall maker set.
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: game, kids, money
Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire? Sure. Here you are. Thanks - but half the pages are missing. What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: money
Yo' Mama is so poor, she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken to lick other people's fingers.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, money, Yo mama
The first paper money press was invented when Chuck Norris drew a design under his boot and stepped on a tree.
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has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, money