‘Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats, then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.’
Fred Allen
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Today in lesson Little Jonny went to the back of the room and Miss McRacen went "Not in the back."
Jonny: "That's what she said."
Miss: "Get out!"
Jonny "She said that too."
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Q: What did the penis say to the condom?
A: Cover me im going in!
What do a clitoris, an anniversary, and a toilet have in common?
Men always miss them.
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Lost my watch at a party once. Saw a guy stepping on it while sexually harassing a girl.
I walked up to the dude, punched him straight in the nose.
No one does that to a girl, not on my watch.
Girl: "Do you believe in puppy love?"
Boy: "I tried it once, but their assholes are too small."
Sex is like math:
Add the bed
Subtract the clothes
Divide the legs and pray you dont multiply
Little Johnny took sex ed and every day when little Johnny would come in from school he'll tell his dad for learning sex ed well one day we'll just come in and he said that I got thrown out sex ed Lil Johnny's daddy says how do you get thrown out sex ed Little Johnny said well Dad I got in trouble for eating during class.
Q: How do you know a blonde just lost her virginity?
A: The crayons are still sticky.
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Q: Why do rednecks like having sex doggie style?
A: That way they can both watch wrestling.